The methface of evil

If anything good came of Chaos, besides derisive laughs and pepperoni love, it's the video below. It comes from an extra on the DVD in which (former?) wrestler/Chaos director David Defalco bounces his pecs all over the L.A. County coroner's office. The clip below features coroner giving his theory on the link between meth use and demonic possession. Well, we'll call it a theory for now.

Before giving us his not-at-all explained theory, though, shouldn't he have revealed what the fuck he is smoking? Formaldehyde?

I have absolutely no experience with meth, so this news (we'll call it "news" for now) is hilarious to me. Meth allows you to fuck for, like, 36 hours straight and be a medium for demons? Is there anything that drug can't do?

Comments

[meeeeee]

yeah....i bet you that evangelical pastor can testify to that!

[Joe]

Now why didn't Nancy Reagan peddle this shit on "Different Strokes"? It would have saved a generation of junkies! David Defalco - yum. Post more of him, just for shits and giggles, Rich. He's dreamy. I had the unfortunate experience of being with a guy who was on meth - he was horny and unable to get hard. What a lame fucking demon!

[Michael]

He's being cautious, the consummate scientist. I'm sure we're only a few double-blind demon studies away from his "theory" being borne out as scientific fact.

[Lindsay]

So that's what happened to Fergie's face.

[Lara]

i found this website incredibly informative about meth:

http://www.lifeormeth.com/

i read everything on that page one day. i'm familiar with drugs and the harm that they can do, but after reading this page, i will never ever ever touch meth. it's a worthwhile webpage.

[Foxy]

I had a friend in college who refused to play with a Ouija board while stoned or drunk because allegedly "ghosts and forces" find it easier to inhabit beings who are in altered states.

[Gayest Neil]

I've made myself a Tyra Santeria novena candle, and I'm going to light it tonight and pray and have a two-hour cry for all the meth users out there.

[mariaaaaa]

This almost makes me want to see Chaos.

It's been a long time since I last, you know... The stuff that is around now is way stronger and different. Yeah, apparently it makes you ultra horny, but wanting to do it for 18 hours sounds like a bore to me. Quality over quantity I always say.

And this dude is a coroner? Don't you have to be a medical doctor to have that job? So wouldn't he be familiar with the hallucinations that the drug can induce, what can happen to your mind if its sleep deprived, what the ravages of addiction will have some do??? His conclusion is demonic posession? Really? Wow. I wonder if he has a theory on whether there's a correlation between demonic possession and one's blood humour.

[Ross]

It's all true. Fortunately, demons are repelled by industrial strength stainless steel chain, so just wear some around your neck. It's the new garlic.

[xnowhereboyx]

Apparently meth makes you really horny and removes any inhibitions but like someone said makes it difficult to have an erection which is why meth users end up being bottoms and having unprotected sex with strangers ergo the link between meth use and HIV transmission.

[Michael]

It's the new garlic. Ha!

[spazmo]

Brings new meaning to the term "gateway drug", doesn't it?

But actually, if meth causes impotence, how come every demon I've ever seen has a big honking chub-on? Pazuzu's gonna sue you for defamation, Rich.

True story: one time on acid I got possessed by a Kandarian demon from the Evil Dead movies. Fortunately, nobody got hurt, and all charges were eventually dropped.

[L.A.]

So I happen to know a thing or two about the LAC Coroner's office, and I can tell you that this guy, who is actually a rather cool guy, is an autopsy tech, not a doctor. He assits the pathologist during an autopsy by cutting, clipping, and sawing as needed, no PhD required. I'm sure he speaks only of his own personal theories and doesn't represent the L.A County Coroner in any way, etc.

[Ross]

To dispel some generalizations mentioned here, I will admit to meth use in my past (thankfully I got out unscathed) and I never had a problem getting a hard-on, nor did my partner at the time. I've heard all the impotence stories, but it's definitely not true in my personal experience.

[rustyspigot]

Sex for 36 hours? Huh? Really, I think I would be wanting a little snack break/bathroom break/get the hell away from me break and don't even look at me break.

[Agnostic Chance]

Ok Rich, let me switch hats here for a minute....

Let's suppose for a moment that hostile spiritual beings/ghosts/demons/things do exist and that they do enjoy instigating harm. (It's really not too hard to imagine if you try.) Now let's imagine one of these suckers is flying about, looking for a juicy soul to torment. Who would be the first candidate? Drug addicts and mental patients, perhaps, with their frequent and obvious delusions? Or young children, with their active "imaginations"? There is no question that drug use and mental disease go hand-in-hand with whacked-out brain chemistry. But who is to say that these altered states do not indeed make some people hyper-aware? Anyone who's done a little L can tell you that this may not be too far-fetched. And if people who are already down make very vulnerable targets for unscrupulous HUMANS, then why not spirits? People are quick to use "science" to scoff at the possiblity of the paranormal. But science has yet to prove OR DISPROVE the existence of ghosts or gods. And until that proof (either way) is forthcoming, I will not scoff or dismiss anything that COULD be true. Flat Earth, anyone?

[Emily Melrose]

If I were a demon, I'd want to inhabit someone hot. Methface in a 360 turn is still methface.

[Rich]

I hear what you're saying, AC, but all I can think is teapot. I think Richard Dawkins might have me brainwashed and I think I like it.

[Christina Warren]

The only thing that ever happened to me when I snorted meth (and experience I never want to repeat mind you) was that I walked around my apartment complex with my top off and I took a shower (non-sexually) with two other girls. My gay best friend (who provided the shit) went down on a girl (see, that's worse than being demoniacally possessed), but I just exposed my breasts. If I knew demonic possessions could have been part of it, I would have done more!

No, in all honesty -- that guy needs to spend some time away from dead people. Autopsy tech or not, he's clearly been around that stuff a little too long. Sadly, the shit coming out of his mouth was more entertaining than almost any horror movie I've seen in the last five years.

[Whatthe!?]

My biggest question is why as a coroner/lab tech, whatever he is, why does he comment on the toxicology of things?

Is he saying that he looked at the killer's toxicology or the victim's? Most killer's aren't caught at the scene of the crime so he has no basis for what their toxicology was at any given time except for presumably death.

All things considered this guy is whacko!

[spazmo]

Shit, Whatthe!?, that's a good point.

You gotta wonder how much longer this whackjob (nice guy or not) will be keeping his job...

[Kristin]

What I really want to say is that the current "I'm gonna be on fourfour" banner is my favorite you've ever made. I'm from Indiana.

love
kp

[sean]

Sometimes, some people - usually newbies - when they use meth, stay up just a little too long...and start seeing/hearing things - e.g., the FBI may seem to lurk on the roof of your neighbour's house, those bushes you're walking beside may have attained human qualities, Satan may reveal himself to you in a dumpster....it's called a bad sketch, and is scary only to those who are actually in it.

To everyone else - it's just incredibly irritating.

[mariaaaaa]

Hi Agnostic Chance, and everybody! I want to throw in my two cents... I believe that some people are more sensitive to energies that may be flowing out there. What these energies may or may not be I won't speculate, but just knowing what I know about meth, I think the demon sighting and possession talk can probably be chalked up to no sleep and chemically induced hallucinations.
My friend's abuelita used to say "Son tus pecados que te dan miedo" (sp!), which means "Your sins are what scare you". She'd say that if one of the kids was spooked by a scary movie or afraid of the dark. So yeah, I think that guilt, fear and some existential dread also play into it as well.

[Vanessa]

WTF is Chaos? Yes, let's call it a "theory." For now.....

Why's come doesn't anyone who is in power get possessed and start a war? (Dubya does not count.) How come they don't possess Wall Street and crash the stock market? What is the point of possessing a stinky crankhead? The Devil is such an underachiever but I've known that ever since that movie where he got his ass beaten by Winona Ryder.

For reals though, possession is the new UFO abduction.