Look at this bastard:
The other day, I ate a banana as I was getting ready in the morning. Winston was still in bed. When I went into my room to get my shit together, he started sniffing the air. He must have smelled it on my fingers or breath and, evidently, he was pissed that he wasn't invited to share in it because when I walked back into the living room a few minutes later, he was there, sitting on my keyboard looking up at me. I really think he was doing it to spite me. We've run into this problem before. Once, he ended up somehow deleting an entire recap I did for work when I left my computer open overnight. Thank god Wordpress saves every draft individually, otherwise I might be wearing Winston as earmuffs now.
But that's not the point of this post...
The point is that there's this way he loves to sit with right paw extended and left paw tucked that I find totally confusing. It's just one more thing that makes me convinced that this cat isn't a cat at all, but an alien here to, I don't know, eat bananas and poop in bathtubs. An alien here to weird out and annoy. This is his version of the Vulcan salute:
I guess he flipped things around in the last one since he wasn't actually on the computer, potentially destroying my work, so the whole situation was thrown off.
Anyway, I love that this seems to serve no function. Does he figure that if someone comes with a table saw and gets the extended leg, he'll at least have the other one? Does he figure at all?
A reader named Lesley Robin, who writes the blog Floating Robot, also has an Etsy store, in which she offers little plaques that are made to look like faux-taxidermy rendered in clay. She sent me one of Winston:
I conferred with he who has been immortalized in polymer...
...and he approves.