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December 02, 2005



"nigel'd reward ye" is an anagram so brilliant that i feel privileged to have access to your fertile mind, good sir.

but i must deduct points for your bre love.


that MIA reference with nigel's mother was priceless!! god, you're good. if i was a gay man, i would be in love with you. i have to also say, i have found nigel's newfound horniness this year rather intoxicating...


Oh, sheeeit - 2nded on the MIA reference.


OMG, *ROTFLMAO* (quietly, though, 'cause I'm at work) @ the "Nigel'd reward ye" anagram. I love you for that.

Is that like, Nigel's thing? Every cycle he's crushing on one of the girls? It was April one year, now Nik. Hmm..


Ok, so I was gonna say you were soooooooo wrong for two things but some folks already mentioned 'Galang'. OK-everybody, I mean. However, nobody mentioned 'Galaxy Glue'. This is specifically why I am a dearreader and fan of you Mr. Rich. Am I dating myself for knowing 'Incredible Shrinking Woman'? Yes, yes I am.

Bre is gross but I la-la-LOVE the footage of her and Nicole, "So I'm not getting you more, so now what?"

PS-Nigel=HOT! I wanted 'Mr.' Jay to continue with his pants and drawers. But replace 'Mr.' Jay with me and re-title the show 'Nigel Barker is America's Next Top'. Raorw!


if i were god, i'd send you my blessings.


you were right--you nailed it! nigel is *so* andrew ridgeley. however, i would still like to enter this exhibit:
Maybe? Which is an anagram for 'Ego cel neo-orgy'


>She came out and was all, "Blaze a blaze, galangalangalang. Purple haze, galangalangalang."


also, the baddest bitch album cover w/ Bre = fourfour > TWOP. Totally.


Nigel is sooo DREAMY.

Please DO re-cap Project Runway, if anything for the insightful pictures that you post.


Another classic re-cap of the insanely insipid yet COMPLETELY addictive ANTM.
Bre is one part Camille ("signature" horse trot, condescending, extremely self absorbed) and one part Eva (short, blubbers uncontrollably when-literally- called on the carpet); so she cancels herself out.
Nicole is a deer in headlights 24-7.
That leaves Nik. Pretty, yes, but she just doesn't register. Even Tyra said to her (and Nicole) something to the effect of "You've got ONE WEEK to develop a personality." And just like with Naima, who "came out of her shell" at the very last minute, and Mercedes, who didn't win but went from being "the girl at the mall" to "edgy" in Rome ("We weren't sure if you could do it, but girl, you EDGY now!") at the very end, either Nik or Nicole will have this "amazing" Tyra-approved transformation and win. Because, in the end, SOMEONE has to.


Can I just say...I love you. I haven't even actually seen the actual episodes of ANTM in a few weeks (I watch One Tree Hill instead, and try to catch ANTM reruns on Tuesdays, but always forget) yet I religiously come to your blog to get your recaps. Your comments are TOO DAMN FUNNY (blaze a blaze galangalangalang ROTFLMAO!!!) and your references are so random yet on point (looking out in the morning rain, lol).

You need your own show or something. VH-1 should call you up to be on one of their many "I Love The" or "Best ____ Ever" shows.

I heart you so much!

Veronica Vinegar

Rich, you really outdid yourself on this recap! I love it. Now I get excited that it's Friday not because of the weekend, but because of your recaps!


Can I just tell you how much I love your blog!!! A friend sent me a link to your wonderful post about Lisa Whelchel (I swear I have listened to it like 15 times since I downloaded it) and ever since I can't stop reading it! It's fabu! I even gushed about it on my own blog. Keep up the ANTM rants! Love them! Almost as much as I love Nigel (grrr!!!). In the words of Dannii Minogue, "LOVE + KISSES"


Rich, did you happen to catch the Tyra with the "MODELS IN TROUBLE" theme.
Naima was on it and all "if i dont work i cant support her" it was a cry fest(or so the preview I caught online would have me think.
Like I said before its going to be Nicole.
They just keep blathering on about her.
So many good references in this roundup.

Oh and Im confuse are the Naima things "real" commercials or one offs only shown during ANTM because she doesnt get work otherwise?


it would be such a shame if you didn't recap project runway 2. even if you aren't keen on the history of fashion or whatever, your comments and observations in general are fucking hilarious.

Artie James

Simple Analogy:

Whitney is to Bobby as Artie James is to FourFour's Recaps.


We so, so, so need soundbites of Naima's flat delivery on the Covergirl commercial. Wasn't salesmanship part of her training? Feh. Unless she's selling sleeping pills, I ain't buying.


This recap is fabulous! Their interpretation of punk is pure BS. And I almost lost it when Tyra made up that BS about "top models aren't short". Uhhhh.. didn't she claim Eva was short, and wasn't she a top model?

Everyone can see that Nik should be the winner. It's just so obvious it's ridiculous. And I'm glad we got to see her bitchy side this week. Meow!


2 phrases: "Old Lady Whore" & "Jolly Green Nicole". 2 good.


Definitely do Project Runway recaps. Making fun of Heidi's accent is enough material in itself.


Excellent recap.


You brought me to the edge of the cliff with "Galaxy Glue" and then you shoved me over the side with "galangalangalang." I'm still laughing.

Only one episode? What will I do??


That Tyra gif you made is my favorite thing ever. I want to just watch it for days. And I am with you... Nik better win this thing. SHE BETTER WIN!


best recap ever: thanks, rich!

and thanks for the '4th baddest' CD cover, the andrew ridgely, the galang, the jheri curl and the the twiggy/miz jay animation!

one last request before the final: please put a hit out on that tired, platinum-shark-fin-headed, lip-glossed poosy, "mr." jay. just let me know what my cut is and where to send it... he must die!


LOL at 'Looking out on the morning rain, she used to feel so uninspired. God don't like uninspired'

And thank you for the height thing, I was wondering the same thing.

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