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May 19, 2006



"Why was it horrible that Nicole won because she was white, but awesome that "a brown girl finally won" (by "finally" I assume y'all mean "since two cycles ago")? Oh, that's right, the predictable race politics of the comments section.

(not directed at Rich, but at his supplicants)"

It was horrible that Nicole won because she wasn't the BEST imo,not because she was white.


Rich, I salutificate you. Mwah!
Thank you for all of your hard work!! You always make me laugh.


Thank you, Rich for working so hard on these recaps! You make me smile each week! You are such an awesome person to share your talents with the world. Much love to you until the next cycle!

miss mandi

So sad it's over! And thank you largically for writing the fantasticus posts! Such wit you have - it's hard to be funny in print (or blog). I think I have your weekly posts to blame for my ANTM obsession. Yes, it's your fault (and that of Janice the Genital Wart, whom I adore).

And to all the people that have problems with discussion of race and the alleged "90's identity politics" - it's just embarrassing to read crabby comments like yours. Leaf through any fashion magazine and count how many women of color grace the pages. I can tell you right now: anywhere from zero to one!

Again, thanks for writing the recaps. And will you PLEASE start paying more attention to your other kitty?

Fred V

Your commentary RAWKS... and I'm actually feeling the ANTM winner for the first time since Eva!

(Jade-esque snip to end the season)


Call me a suckah, but I'm still fond of Adrienne's naked shot from Cycle 1 as the best Top Model photo.


your recaps are the highlight of my fridays! thanks a lot, and post whatever you want re: this show. We'll love it. :)


"And to all the people that have problems with discussion of race and the alleged "90's identity politics" - it's just embarrassing to read crabby comments like yours."

what's embarassing is that you seem to think that staying mired in unreflective, boilerplate discourse gets anyone anywhere. yeah, duh, i know there's a racial bias in modeling (as in most other areas), but how is that evidenced in a show where 50% of the winners have been women of color? bug-eyed, big-nosed nik didn't win "because she was black"? yet had she won, some of the same comments that have been appearing on this board would have continued - "oh, yes, black, but not DARK enough." in the meantime, no one seems to get that it's danielle's VOICE (horribly grating, cracking constantly) that's the main problem.

yes, nicole sucks as a spokesmodel (all the personality of rubber cement, with a delivery guaranteed to compete with sominex), but is she worse than the she-beard bearing naima? danielle's commercial sucked, and joanie's was excellent. and danielle DESERVED to win, nonetheless, because she was younger, slimmer, taller and probably more beautiful.

so now let's rally against all the injustice against short people in modeling. or fat people. or ugly people.

it's a lot more complex than race, honey.


(oh, and jade? i'm convinced she must have a learning disability. seriously.)


(and twiggy's face upon jade's diva-rama departure was priceless)

Mr. Prince

Best Cycle Ever. Best. RECAPS. EVER!!!

I love you rich! you're my gay new icon.


I loved Joanie just as much as I loved Danielle and would have been happy with either one of them being the winner. Personally, I would like to have seen the first ever ANTM tie. Both had personality, inner beauty and outer beauty. I have no doubt Joanie will also receive a major contract and that they will remain close friends (just like Tyra and Heidi Klum).

"Why was it horrible that Nicole won because she was white, but awesome that "a brown girl finally won" (by "finally" I assume y'all mean "since two cycles ago")? Oh, that's right, the predictable race politics of the comments section."

It IS horrible that Nicole won the previous cycle. She won because she is indistinguishable from any everyday girl on the street. She won because Cover Girl needed a better mascot than Naima.

Nicole seemed to have been preselected as the winner halfway through that cycle. Maybe it was a direct order from Cover Girl or maybe it was based on the best fit with the agency the Cycle 5 winner was to be assigned to (FORD is very plain, and VERY WASPy). Either way, it was obvious (despite all the "high fashion" b.s.) that they were looking for a specific type of model for the Cycle 5 winner:
Safe. Moldable. Commercial. "Cover Girl"...

So no matter how well the other girls did (or how badly Nicole did) that cycle seemed to be manipulated to ensure she'd be the winner. Which made Cycle 5 a bigger farce than all the other cycles put together...and all the girls (and half the audience) knew it.


if covergirl conspired to have nicole win (when nik was actually more eloquent), why in the world would they not have stepped in to rule out danielle? again, look at danielle's commercial vs. joanie's - and, honestly, which is better?

oh, sorry, i forgot - conspiracy theory lacks logic.

Real Girl

69. Me. Crying. Because NO MORE RECAPS! Will miss you bunches.


Thank you , thank you, thank you Rich! I looked forward to this each and every Friday and I was never disappointed. (I might have to send Jade a thank you card for giving you so much material to go on.) I have never cared so much about the outcome of any cycle as much as I did this one. Danielle is the People's Champ. I can't wait for the next set of "My Life as a Covergirl" commercials. And in tribute of the People's Champ, I have officially added the work "sucka" to my daily vocabulary.

"I bleed for you hoes". LMAO! It's so true. Thanks again Rich!


Day-um! Going to miss Rich's recaps even more now that he shows the chops to work in a Throbbing Gristle ref. "By far the worst was the hamburger lady" - jeezis that song scared me bad way back when.


Thank You!!


nice work on the recaps, doll. i look forward to more! consider this your thanks! thanks!


Oh my god, I cannot get enough of these recaps. And I love that Danielle even had a gap in her baby pictures. Thank you so much for all the hard work you put into these recaps, not to mention everything else you post!


So sad this has come to an end... and Rich my hungover ass will miss your hilarious Friday recaps, NOW what's gonna cheer me up enough to study?! Also, I have to say, I spent Weds eve and some of Thurs a little sad, I thought I loved Joanie + Danielle pretty equally and was thrilled they were the final 2, but my heart kind of dropped when Joanie lost. The way she just had a smile for everything and everyone, and I don't know she really was just so sweet, and seemed to genuinely want to be friends with Danielle, I guess I really responded to that. But yay for Miss Danielle and I hope that the person above who thinks Joanie will get a contract too is right!!!


so mad that you made a remix of akon/jeezy's soul survivor feat. jade!!! Even madder that I uncontrollably laughed both times she said it!!

also, thank you for all the work you did this cycle. your after the shows are WAY better than Oprah's!

i think the break until next cycle will be good for us. i think we need some time apart. once you showed up in one of my dreams, i knew things had gone too far.


oh Rich thank you so much for this seasons recaps. i have never posted before but i read your site all the time and i fucking LOVE it. your "specializatincs"in all things pop culture are much "apreciatable" and you are loved.


Yes, your recaps truly always brightened up my day. Sad that Joanie lost, but at least, the "considerating" haiku-reciting Jade didn't, and that's good enough.

Can't wait for next cycle...and for whatever cuh-razy doesn't-mean-to-be-stupid-but-is-anyway reality show you'll cover next.

Cheers to ya, Rich! And count me in for that Top 10 Moments thing..that'll be sweet.


Aww, sucka! I do love you! I know you bleed for us and we love you even more for it! Yay Danielle! You're the bestest and I'll keep checking back to just see what you're writiterating bouts. Truth be told- I got hooked when I read your "MTV: Fat Camp" recap. ANTM was just a blessednessdedness bonifidem.


Here in Canada, the Canadian ANTM is starting next Wednesday. But they won't be nearly as fun without your comments on it :((((

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