Though it premiered a few weeks ago, the clip of Lucas Prata's appearance on My Super Sweet 16 has yet to make its way onto YouTube. Um, hello? Am I the only one with video ripping ability who recognizes how awesome it is to watch these teen girls gag over this stocky, thirtysomething meathead whose KTU staple, "And She Said...," is to Cher's "Believe" what his last name is to "Prada?" Designer impostor, baby!
Anyway, I've righted that wrong by uploading to YouTube. Just doing my part, guys. You know that in the distant future, when there's no more storable media, just YouTube, people are going to want to know what privileged Long Island culture was like in the mid-'00s. The following three minutes is everything you'll never need to know about that.
A few things to note:
- To Meleny, she whose Sweet 16 (actually, Sweet 18) is being profiled in this episode, there is ONLY ONE singer in the world and his name is (duh) Prata. He's her first and second favorite!
- "Lucas Prata, he's like an amazing singer. And he's here! Whoo!"
- His two male backup dancers are wearing t-shirts with the lyrics of the song printed on them. On the front, they say, "And she said..." and on the back? "Yeah yeah yeah." Funny, when I heard this on the radio months ago, I said, "These lyrics are so complex that only a silkscreen could do them justice."
A postscript: someone I know went to an 18+ club in Queens last week (because in Queens, apparently it's acceptable for grown people go to 18+ clubs...yeah, I don't know. It's Queens.) and Prata performed! The teen crowd went batshit, and Prata even mentioned his My Super Sweet 16 appearance. He's proud of this shit, y'all. But then, I would be, too, if I sweat that much without losing any bronzer.
The second video isn't as full of hawtness. It's just raggedy old Tyra Banks singing "We Belong Together" with a bunch of women's prison inmates. This, of course, happened on last week's Tyra-in-prison episode of her talk show. She does this gimmicky shit always around sweeps and often otherwise, and I eat it up like half of the time. I'm just a sucka for her love, tough and self-congratulatory as it may be.
But seriously, "We Belong Together!" That's at least as around-the way as those cornrows.
Argh!!! I can't access the videos.
Posted by: | May 22, 2006 at 02:53 PM
Sorry! I'll throw up the AVIs tonight.
Posted by: Rich | May 22, 2006 at 02:55 PM
It just hit me that in Brazil they had a "Miss Prison" beauty pageant and a rather attractive blonde (doing time for drug smuggling) won the contest. Maybe Tyra should sponsor "America's Next Top Security Prison Model". I wanna see Agent Orange become someone's prison bitch...
Posted by: Crazy about the girl | May 22, 2006 at 03:27 PM
That was the 1st and only sweet 16 I've ever seen...
I loved all of Meleny's threats (he better be there, he better sing for me, those girls better be jealous); she's so tough.
Lucky she always gets what she wants, she looked like a biter to me.
Posted by: T | May 22, 2006 at 04:47 PM
Oh, dear. I hope someone in the prison gave Tyra those cornrows, and that she didn't just show up that way. That would be rather patronizing. "Hey y'all, I love cornrows! I'm just like you, except rich and free!"
Posted by: JH | May 22, 2006 at 04:59 PM
hilarious.
Posted by: snag | May 22, 2006 at 05:20 PM
Who the hell is this guy? When I saw this show a few weeks ago, I couldn't believe that all those kids had actually heard of him. Seriously, who is he? Is he popular? At 25, am I already completely out of touch with what teenagers like these days?
Posted by: cathy | May 22, 2006 at 05:24 PM
The funny/sad thing about Tyra is that she's taking herself so seriously, when everyone is just looking and laughing.
Posted by: chad | May 22, 2006 at 05:35 PM
I wonder how Fatman Scoop and Jonathan Peters felt, being the consolation prizes for the girl who really wanted Lucas Prata.
Posted by: starstattoo | May 22, 2006 at 05:39 PM
Cathy, I was thinking the EXACT same thing. I'm so not "with it" anymore at a whopping 25 years old.
Posted by: munchy mcgee | May 22, 2006 at 05:40 PM
Oh, and Miss Tyra, no sistah with a five-finger forehead should be wearing braids. It's called Traction Alopecia, and it is the leading cause of hair loss in African women. All that pulling on your hair will make your hairline recede permanently - just ask Angela Bassett, Lynn Whitfield, Alfre Woodard, Whoopi Goldberg...
Posted by: starstattoo | May 22, 2006 at 05:48 PM
Sometimes (like when Ultragrrrl waxes ecstatic about My Chemical Romance), I'm ecstatic to not be with it, at 27. A lot of shit's more fun to laugh at than with, anyway, and that takes a few years of perspective-building, I think.
Posted by: Rich | May 22, 2006 at 05:50 PM
Not sure if anyone cares about this, but I actually knew Mr. "Prata" while growing up in LI...and happened to go on a few dates with him...How did I meet him you ask? Well, the power of the Internet; that being an AOL Chat room, haha, sorry I was like 19 at the time !! His real first name is RAUL, yes, I know too ethnic for stardom, and at the moment I cannot recall his real last name. Raul got his start as a dancer with uber-legend George Lamont, you know "Bad of the Heart!"...Anyway, he is a true bonehead, LI style...I think his bio says hes about 25, he should be about 36 or 37 by now. He was 31 when I met him and this was 6 years ago! All in all, he is more retarded than you can imagine!!
Posted by: Anon | May 22, 2006 at 06:19 PM
Oh and damn he's gotten FAT !!!!!!!!!
Posted by: Anon | May 22, 2006 at 06:23 PM
Anon, I care! Thanks a lot for sharing!
Posted by: Rich | May 22, 2006 at 06:28 PM
I am 19 and I don't know who this Prata guy is. I'm real confused by him.
Posted by: juliet | May 22, 2006 at 06:28 PM
OMG, hilarious! I watched Sweet 16 when it aired, and I was like WTF... who is this sleazeball and why are these girls so hot for him? I could understand if he was at least attractive, but he's just a sweaty overage Menudo cast-off. I'm with Cathy too... How at 30 am I so completely out of touch? I mean, I'm an ANTM die-hard, watch American Idol, watch E! Lucas Prata has never guest starred on anything I watch!
Posted by: Hadey | May 22, 2006 at 06:28 PM
i googled lucas prata. i read his bio. i watched the clip. i have never heard this song. i gobble up every pop culture site imaginable. and i still have no idea who this guy is. someone please explain!
Posted by: elaine | May 22, 2006 at 07:22 PM
that super sweet 16 shit makes me sick. david spade did a really funny segment about it on the showbiz show. funny, but really depressing at the same time.
Posted by: tootie | May 22, 2006 at 07:22 PM
Are we absolutely sure he's not actually Joey Buttafuco?
Oh, and I had traction allopecia once. Not on my head, though.
Posted by: Michael | May 22, 2006 at 08:25 PM
Ok, 24 and from NY and I don't know who this Prata guys is, although I now know that "he's so hot!" Eesh, he looks like my uncle... ok...
And thanks for that sweet Tyra clip! I'm unable to catch her show, so thank god you're here to update me on the important things. This prison singing was almost as poingant as her moment of silence in Phuket!
I wonder how many years they're getting off of their sentences for saying that Tyra's an inspiration to all of them?
Posted by: Christina | May 22, 2006 at 09:35 PM
Hey what's with the Love and Pride link on the right there? I push play thinking I'm going to see some hot lesbian action and all I get is some cheesy QAF merchandise! Granted I did enjoy QAF, but boo for the tease! LOL
Posted by: Christina | May 22, 2006 at 09:37 PM
I sincerely love Tyra. Her show tonight on troubled teenaged girls was really good and she hardly talked about herself at all.
Posted by: Brandon | May 23, 2006 at 12:54 AM
I don't know why you call it Crap Monday, because showing Madonna as Jesus, Tyra singing in prison, introducing us to Lucas Prata, and making a Cher reference all in one day is just fabulous!
Posted by: Abrego | May 23, 2006 at 09:14 AM
Am I also the only person who had no idea that's Hilary Duff singing the Sweet 16 theme song? Just found that out.
Posted by: Cathy | May 23, 2006 at 10:04 AM