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Oh, the Jersey accent... I'll tell ya, I don't miss it. LOVE that photo, hilarious! It's kind of a "if she only knew" moment.


That was the best post ever!!! Rich Does The Titty Bar!


That's not Rudy, that's Rocky. Geez. Pay attention, people.


LOL - oh my God, what a fantastic article (it's more than just a mere post)! You're a brave man; titty bars seem depressing to me.

I'm printing the Mary Carey + Rich pic and making it my f***ing Christmas cards (with photoshopped Santa hats of course...)

HA! Just kidding... the Carrie Nations are gonna be on the Christmas card.

Mary had a birthday last week. She's supposedly 26. When I read that I said to myself "Oh hell no! That woman is at least 30, if not 35." Based on your picture above, I'd say the jury is still out. On the other hand, she could very well be 26... hard livin' y'know...


I love sitting on your lap like that


That's not Rudy, that's Rocky. Geez. Pay attention, people.

Posted by: Mia

No need to be snitty, Mia. I never even realized there *was* a Rocky. Sheesh.

I am sorry Rich, and I apologize to your kitties as well.


hahahah this post was truly hilarious! i have wanted never ventured into a titty bar but now i want to go! i think those strippers were only after you b/c u were prolly the only decent looking guy in there! i'm glad u got the shirt!




She doesn't have any stubble or red bumps from waxing at all! How'd she DO that? I have a permanent 5 o'clock shadow down there!


It looks like you washed the coochie juice off the shirt.


I am not a fan of the cooter but I would like to see her snatch. Common on Buddy! Show us some snatch.


I love that story.

Was her snatch totally bald? I bet it was.


i've been reading your blog for months now (i especially love the antm recaps!) but never commented. and feeling that it was slightly stalkerish to read and not let you know, i've felt the need to comment. but never have. but this, oh dear lord... i cannot not comment. this is by far the most entertaining thing i have read since... i don't even know when. i just had to thank you!
p.s. the guy behind your left shoulder... is it just me or does he bare a striking resemblence to dean cain in his superman days?


Hi Rich! I played "The Coyote" in Pervert! and I came upon your post. It is great! Good for you for venturing into that joint to see Mary and thanks for supporting Pervert! You are the best! Feel free to leave a comment on the movie websitesite fan forum at:


I am sorry for saying snatch and cooter. I should have said pussy. I am sorry.

Thesaurus Rex

Rich, you are the cutest, funniest boy in cyberspace. If you didn't have a bf, I would be actively campaigning for that (ahem) position.

Love to Win and Rudy.


lovelovelove you rich. and she must have an EXCELLENT waxer. :)


I'm awed by your are an excellent writer, you made it possible for me to visualize your experience. I've been a voyeur for a long time but this post compelled me to break my silence.

Veggie Girl

Fascinating, heartbreaking, hilarious. Two very enthusiastic thumbs up. Fine holiday fun.

Truant Muse

Hahaha dude, you look so damn giddy in that picture, I love it. I'd probably be too, not gonna lie.

PS. I just spent half of the weekend down in South Jersey makes me cherish my North Jersey roots and my ability to speak English, sooo much :P

Irish gurlie

Hi Rich, I've been reading and loving fourfour for ages - you've an unbelieveable way with words.

Just one thing. In that picture you and Mary look strangely like brother and sister. It's like Flowers in the Attic meets The Happy Hooker meets, I dunno, your granny's 75th birthday party.

Ah, wiz zeez titty bar article you are spoiling us.


you forgot to mention the small, yet questionable brownish-red stain on the shirt that mary wiped her va-jay-jay with. oh and also, when glitter-little-boobs was trying to squirm for you, she turned to me and said, "you're next!" and i yelled, "no!" but put the dollar you gave me in her underwear anyway.

also, i wish we'd gotten a pic of me in the club wearing my moo-moo. hindsight is 20/20 i guess.


That picture just rules on so many levels.


You, sir, are the sexiest catfag alive.


Whoa! You gre up in Mays Landing? I lived in Margate during High School and absolutely LOVED when VOlcanic Eruptions was promoting Avalanche, the 400lb pudding wrestler.

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