Here is Winston:
(Download)
Cats and string, what a combo! Ho ho, bet you never saw that before! This is more proof that owning a cat is an exciting adventure everyday. Seriously, it's a 24/7 party over here.
(More nonsense that has nothing to do with anything is below.)
Here's a chunk do and don't:
When sporting chunk, do quasi-active things that require bending your midsection, so as to emphasize your junk...
...however, if your posture is naturally hunched (and, really, even if it isn't), DON'T. WEAR. THIS.
Meanwhile, Tobey Maguire has never looked better, and this is pretty hot (turn your speakers down).
Here's my favorite song of the week:
Electroclash survivor and sassmaster Soffy O goes new-jill-swing revivalist. It's cunty, too ("Maybe a dog won't leave you / Maybe a dog would please you / Cuz when you don't treat him right, he'll still be there by your side.") Perfect summer listening!
Here's a rant:
Fucking Snakes on a Plane! Look, I know what it's like to get excited for things. Like, really, really excited (of course, this means that I know what it's like to be let down, as well). I'm not trying to slag off Snakes on a Blog or anything that exists in anticipation of the movie, but I will say that I'm tired of being hit over the head with coverage of it in Entertainment Weekly. It couldn't possibly be that Time Warner owns New Line, which is putting out the film, as well as EW, could it? A quick look at Masterfile Premier (which, if anything, is a low number as it sometimes doesn't catalog every single article) reveals that EW has mentioned Snakes 10 times since its initial story on the movie in the Sept. 23 issue (compare that to the seven or so times Superman Returns was mentioned before its release since the fall or the nine times Pirates of the Caribbean was covered before its release). In other words, SHUT UP ABOUT THE MOTHERFUCKING SNAKES, ALREADY, ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY. That Snakes tally, by the way, doesn't include the Aug. 4 cover story (11) or this highly witty bit of self-reference (motherfucking 12!) that ran in last week's issue:
Ho ho ho! Now, then, and forever. Snakes infinity!
What, was something like this too accurate?:
Yeah Winston! And we got a Rudy teaser as well. What a great start to my Friday.
Posted by: Ceese | August 11, 2006 at 10:29 AM
snakes on a plane = ouroboros
rich, you rock.
Posted by: | August 11, 2006 at 10:30 AM
Hot damn, do I loves me some chuck. That's all I'm sayin'.
Posted by: Jessica | August 11, 2006 at 10:35 AM
In a note totally unrelated to anything you just posted, I saw Jody Watley perform at Virgin yesterday and I thought of you.
Posted by: Tom | August 11, 2006 at 10:40 AM
Can you post some chunk batting at string?
Actually I guess Winston is cat chunk! Poor Rudy he's all "What you got there Winston? Is that string!?!?" and Winston's all
"NO! GO AWAY BEFORE I EAT YOUR TAIL."
Posted by: brandy | August 11, 2006 at 10:57 AM
At least Winston sort of moves for the string. My cat, Lance, doesn't move for anything, least of all string. Unless it smacks him in the face a few times. Which is usually does....
It's not cat abuse. I'm just sayin'.
Posted by: Jess | August 11, 2006 at 11:09 AM
Snakes on a Plane has got to go. As does referring to it as SOAP.
Posted by: elb | August 11, 2006 at 11:38 AM
Rudy never gets any camera time. He's like the supporting actor. Poor guy. I want to squeeze Winston's face.. ahh!
Posted by: Luv | August 11, 2006 at 11:42 AM
I must respectfully disagree with your chunk do-and-don't, Rich. More chunk in speedos, please! PLEASE! (And thank goodness you finally posted some more chunk; I've been fiending! Sure, I can find chunk all over the 'net, but there's just something about that NJ chunk...)
Posted by: Thomas | August 11, 2006 at 11:48 AM
Yay Winston! I was watching that new Gene Simmons reality show (sorry) and he has a cat that looks like Winston, only he's orange and his name is Garfield. Adorable!!
Posted by: Courtney | August 11, 2006 at 11:58 AM
Geez, if I'd have known string was such a hot commodity I'd have just sent balls of yarn instead of catnip and mice and the little chaser thingie. Also: I'm still not convinced Winnie isn't a Muppet.
And lastly, you be quiet about SoaP. That movie is going to be brilliant. Brilliant! We as a society need to obsess over it, dammit!
Posted by: Carly | August 11, 2006 at 12:37 PM
I just love that little moment when Winnie looks straight at the camera. Pure Winstony goodness!
Posted by: One of Winston's Legions of Fans | August 11, 2006 at 01:23 PM
"Seriously, it's a 24/7 party over here."
Yeeeah, riiiiiight. Am I supposed to stop asking if I can watch t.v. with you? 'Cause I'm totally not going to. BTW, I love the way Winnie looks as though he's reluctantly playing with the string. "Here. Is this what ya want? Huh? Is it?"
Posted by: Scout | August 11, 2006 at 01:28 PM
Snakes On A Plane: When unfunny hipster shitbags run something into the ground.
Posted by: madison | August 11, 2006 at 01:29 PM
rich i know you like you some hairless chunk, i must admit i prefer some hair on my chunk. pic #2 is the hotness. And yes, please find more chunk holding fake or real guns, or building or... anything that gets that testosterone anger fired up. I subscribe to EW and they will NOT shut UP.
Posted by: ezra | August 11, 2006 at 01:54 PM
http://snakesonaplane.varitalk.com/
Have fun with the link. Loving Winston.
Posted by: Washington Cube | August 11, 2006 at 02:13 PM
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. squish!
Posted by: HF | August 11, 2006 at 02:17 PM
MAO hearts Winston!
And PS.. I love the new banner!
Posted by: Mike @ MAO | August 11, 2006 at 02:34 PM
I will personally be an executive producer for Air Bud 4: Winston on a Plane if you get the greenlight.
Posted by: xnowhereboyx | August 11, 2006 at 02:59 PM
I'm not feelin' Tobey. I'm all for chunk (mostly thanks to your tutelage), but shouldn't there be a chunk do/chunk don't rule regarding proportion? He looks like he needs to jump up and down for a while so some of the chunk slides down into his legs.
Posted by: Michael | August 11, 2006 at 03:12 PM
oh how I love me some Winston <3
Posted by: Aubrey | August 11, 2006 at 05:59 PM
Love the Winston - great angle BTW, I felt like I was there!
Posted by: R.Kitty | August 11, 2006 at 06:41 PM
Thank you, Rich! I love love LOVE Winston!
Posted by: kate | August 11, 2006 at 07:25 PM
I just want to say that I adore your cat...more Winston!
Posted by: F | August 11, 2006 at 09:30 PM
Can you make posters and tees of Winston's fat face? I would buy 'em...he is too fuggin cute Rich! Seriously, his cuteness is off the charts...its like he isn't real:)
xo
Posted by: Orchide | August 12, 2006 at 05:20 AM