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August 16, 2006



her conflation of "blues, jazz, and soul" is the giveaway that she has no idea what she's talking about, nevermind referencing. She probably saw a Vogue spread where the models all sported bobs and thin brows and she thought to herself "1920s! Jazz! That's it! OMG, i love that time"

You put it perfectly a few months ago when you said of Aguilera (and here i'm paraphrasing) that she has a good voice but can't sing. I think her overdone runs are the result of her trying too hard to convince listeners that she's not just the hooer that we think she is (or that she wants us to think she is, depending on whichever single is due for release).

Also, i really really need for her to stop surrounding herself with black back-up singers in her videos. Christina, we don't believe that they're actually your friends. We know they're on the clock and that, secretly, they don't think much of you either.


Love her, love the album(s). Yeah, the whole project is self-indulgent, but so am I; and I admire that quality in someone else so talented.


Why would her back up singers have to be her friends?


It's interesting to me that her "overdone runs" are referenced in the negative (which I agree with) but no one mentions that the queen of all vocal theatrics is that monkey-faced twat, Mariah

You can't be hatin' on one without hatin' on the other. They are of the same ilk. The difference is that Christina can, at least, sing. Mariah is too busy screeching like a howler monkey with a red-hot poker up it's ass. Her warbling makes me want to bloody my ears with an ice-pick.


i mean the way she uses the singers in the video (the latest one)...they're hanging out in her bedroom, playing albums, hair in curlers-- as though having black friends gives her some sort of credibility, you know?


Right on Brandon. And Rich, "a monument to talent without subtlty" is so OTM. I doubt you ever said "she has a good voice but can't sing."

I hate that she bugs me so much while I'm singing along at the top of my lungs. She may be a demon, I'm not sure.

D-D-Do your thing, honey.


I'm with ohnoyoudi'int. I always feel disappointed in Christina because I feel she has this amazing voice that she just keeps doing the same ol' crap with. I thought this album would be different....

...but oh, I can't help but singing along. And I still love "Come on Over." 10x.


I'm with you Rich. I've listened to the album many times and I can't seem to formulate an opinion about it, but I think it's because she can't seem to focus on anything. The album offers a couple of gems, but it feels a bit scattered.


"a bronze statue of Prince with a boner." You've got what I want, Rich, at least when it comes to music criticism . . . and I want it.


alright, found the quote in question that i was paraphrasing

hopefully that link will work.


Ah. Well, I'm sure her good friends, the "black back-up singers," will console her when she learns the truth - that she can't sing.

They'll listen to some records, curl their hair ... just like in the video, which of course reflects her real life.


you're growing tiresome.
if you're going to be a bitchy little twunt, be a funny one.


I totally did say that she has a good voice, but can't sing, which is exaggerated, yes, but it does strike the fundamental point of what I see as sort of wasted talent.

And, guys, please be nice to each other.


OK, you totally made up for, um, what I felt was wasted talent this week. Using Louis Armstrong's bones as drumsticks and the Kate Bush referendum melted my icy (heart) again.


whatwouldjanicedickinsondo, ah now i see what you mean - i haven't seen the video - makes sense now!


That "fucking '80s hairspray-propelled power ballad " is the second single.


"People who orchestrate orgies in wrestling rings shouldn't throw condoms."

^^ this slayed me.^^


Nice schmice. Who wants to read nice? Ohno, own your "twunt-ness".


I made the mistake of listening to the entire album in one go, and my ears are still ringing from all that zoot-suit riot. But I really do admire her for being one of the very few actually talented young performers in pop right now even though she is a pint-sized diva. And because she decided to paint her lips red and do an r&b big band album, she's got muchos cajones to pawn it off on 12-24 year olds. She's got credibility, a fact that's even more apparent now that Britney's changing diapers and Jessica's roller skating to "Holiday."

So congrats to her on this album and her well-hung hubbie. Mmhmmmmm


Rich, I sooo cannot wait to hear what you have to say about "Kelis Was Here" and "B'Day." I get a tingle just thinking about it.


how much speed do you take a day?


Whatever, I think she is one of the best if not the singer out now.... At least she is not a cookie cutter version of what the industry is trying to sell us.....


ha ha, you said "a bronze statue of Prince with a boner."
i'm going to go commission that...




Your writing is too good! I love it.

I really don't like Xtina - I respect her vocal skills, but vocal skills alone don't make an interesting pop star. To me she seems like a bitchy little ugly duckling who can't get over being hot with her fake titties. She allows her constructed sexuality to take over, but not in an interesting or ambiguous way like Madonna did. It's cold and harsh and uninviting. If she had some interesting music maybe I could get past it. But she doesn't.

I was just listening to Brandy's self-titled album from '94. It's so good, and an example of what a hot girl with a fab voice can do with R&B pop - make it danceable and personable. Who would ever think of writing a song about friendship these days? Xtina could use a little sweetness.

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