Yo, there is some wild shit going down in the comments section of my Swan Brooner post. This thing has been up for over four months and the crazies continue to trickle in. Who knew a post on child beauty pageants would attract people of questionable mental capacity and state? (Note to Sara Matter: The men who replied to the post don't want to molest your pageant princesses -- we want to brush their hair and play Barbies with them -- we gay, fool!). People claiming to be Leslie Butler and friends of Swan have written in over the months, but my favorite is one JONATHAN, whose crazed accounts of life in the Butler household include "roumers," attempted gay ass rape, arson as insurance fraud, loving Leslie "as purely as Jesus," being "hospitalized, heart broken, cut, bit, hit, scared, kicked, bleed, cry, tears, pain, miserably depressed" and an extremely liberal philosophy on the use of capital letters and quotation marks. Oh, and as of this morning, he's posted a show of support for himself under another name. Ladies and gentleman, I have a new favorite writer. You paying attention, World of Wonder?
Oh, but I'm not through being self-referential. The real point of this post is to direct you to my interview at the fab Film Experience Blog. Nathaniel's questions were good enough to deserve time and thought -- i.e. I worked hard, so read it! I should note that Nathaniel plugged some links to various fourfour posts into my answers. A lot of links, in fact. I wasn't even out to cite myself or anything. I just repeat myself constantly, I think. So, when in 50 years I'm sitting in a pool of my own piss at some bus stop, going on about how Jade didn't know elephants from dinosaurs, it'll all make sense. It's not so hard to imagine that.
Whatever, I don't care as long as I don't turn out like this:
(Download)
I just chewed off my face watching that clip.
Satan lives!
Posted by: Arthur James | August 01, 2006 at 01:05 PM
Rich, that was some of the craziest shit I've ever seen on the internets. The clip and the comments in that previous post, I mean. Truly amazing.
Posted by: pepper | August 01, 2006 at 01:46 PM
Tyra should totally get that guy to replace the Aswirl twins.
Posted by: xnowhereboyx | August 01, 2006 at 01:48 PM
Oh man, I thought my ex was the most flamboyantly gay man out there. I was wrong; way fucking wrong.
(he's out and proud now - after we had a child together but hey, I'm not bitter. I knew he was at least bi when we hooked up so his coming out didn't shock me much. Plz don't take my comment as bashing above.)
Pagents bring this out in people. But nothing is worse than a bitter queen posting nasty things about an 11 year old's ALLEDGED sex life. EWWW. All he needs is a hag to whine with him; oh wait, he made one up for himself already to agree with his comments.
Too funny!
Posted by: Mandy | August 01, 2006 at 02:24 PM
Off topic - are you watching the VH1 marathon of season 5 of ANTM? :D
Posted by: Mandy | August 01, 2006 at 02:26 PM
Just got the newest issue of Rolling Stone, today, and read a blurb about your site/Florrie post. I've not laughed so hard in a long, long time. From Swan to PR to Florrie... It all warmed my heart.
Posted by: Courtney | August 01, 2006 at 04:08 PM
thank you, thank you, thank you for pointing out the crazy parade in the comment section. jonathan and his many personalities have made my day. i wonder if any of them know that the word "shure" is spelled "sure"?
Posted by: van nasty | August 01, 2006 at 04:23 PM
Spirited A-gay! Rich's Moving Penis!
Oh gosh!
And your mentioned in Rolling Stone!! What's next? Your own tv show? Because I will sell myself to get cable if that happens!
OMG the comments on that post are seriously nutty! The one link that brings you to the photography site with the head shots...if you get famous you should get one of those headshots done...they are sooo wonderful!
I almost want to fly down there and get one myself!
Posted by: brandy | August 01, 2006 at 04:24 PM
Obviously, the crazy people saw your quote on Bravo, and because all psychopaths are total starfuckers, you are now a victim of fame, just like those you've so skillfully and good naturedly maligned! OH, THE IRONY!
"good naturedly maligned"
Is that an oxymoron?
Posted by: Scout | August 01, 2006 at 04:57 PM
P.S.
How can we be so sure the guy in the clip is gay?
Posted by: Scout | August 01, 2006 at 04:59 PM
What in blazes was that!? Words.. fail me...
Posted by: Aubrey | August 01, 2006 at 05:14 PM
Oh god, I so needed all of that today. Thank you ever so.
Posted by: Carly | August 01, 2006 at 09:05 PM
P.S.
How can we be so sure the guy in the clip is gay?
Straight men do not have that kind of rhythem.... believe me... We aren't that perky, either....
Taters woman wishes Tater was that perky... but it ain't happening...
Posted by: tater | August 01, 2006 at 11:26 PM
OhmyGod. I totally SUCK at sarcasm.
Posted by: Scout | August 02, 2006 at 02:32 AM
1. That clip: hilarious. Aside from the fancy footwork, the look at that 4-year-old's face is just classic. And the fact that he's dancing in someone's unfinished basement just adds to the beauty that is that clip.
2. I just read the Film Experience interview. I lurve Samantha Morton as well. "Morvern Callar" is the go-to movie when I can't go to sleep. Which doesn't work because I end up watching the whole thing again anyway :-)
3. "Spirited A-Gay"? I almost choked on my cereal.
Posted by: rebelde01 | August 02, 2006 at 02:42 AM
That clip was just...monstrous.
Usually, Rich, you make me proud of my orientation, but dude.
I feel like prancing in front of a bus right now.
Posted by: spazmo | August 02, 2006 at 06:51 AM
naw scout, you don't suck at sarcasm. Straight men don't recognize sarcasm. Which is why Taters gay friends have a lot of fun at his expense...
Posted by: tater | August 02, 2006 at 09:22 AM
Rich I just noticed your new banner! Awesome!! Can I hope for an upcoming post on the movie?? I haven't seen the "full" version, just what I think was a shortened one packaged with 2 others and called "Three Extremes". Would LOVE a post on it!!
Posted by: WW | August 02, 2006 at 02:36 PM
Rich, can you upload the entire film? I need to hear the "He's still workin' on me" song. Its self-effacing spiritual message is needed in these tumultuous times.
xo
Posted by: Danielle | August 02, 2006 at 02:51 PM
Wait...straight guys read this blog?
The whole film would be a lot, but I think I could swing "He's Still Workin' On Me." No "Lipstick on Your Collar," though?
Posted by: Rich | August 02, 2006 at 02:59 PM
The ball and chain makes me.... She wants me to get in touch with my feminine side...
Actually, she got tater hooked on Project Runway (hoping that Alison is willing to do a threesome) and tater also has a wee Winnie fetish... Its going to get me tossed out of the mens club, but there you have it...
Posted by: tater | August 02, 2006 at 03:08 PM
Mmmmmm...Dumplings!
Posted by: Ross | August 02, 2006 at 03:10 PM
http://photographybykarensonnier.com/karen_003.htm
These have been giving me nightmares!
Posted by: brandy | August 02, 2006 at 03:27 PM
oh, how i love that bitchy little queen. He was so passive-aggressive towards the girls while profiting handsomely from the aspirations of their misguided mothers.
A genius, some might say.
Posted by: whatwouldjanicedickinsondo | August 02, 2006 at 06:38 PM
Rich:
I'll take lipstick, that patriotic song, workin', where is love; anything! Why is this not on DVD? People we must rise up on this....and by "rise up' I mean bother dear Rich.
xo
Posted by: Danielle | August 02, 2006 at 07:59 PM