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Au Revoir Brooke. I loved you.

Great recap.


sleep for a few hours and come back to a ton of comments LOL

have to say that Jaeda picture was driving me nuts for days and I couldn't put my finger on it - and you pointed it out - had I had another week I would've eventually thought the same thing - brilliant!!!

disappointing to see Beau Quillian for all of 2 microseconds - which is 2 microseconds MORE then ANTM Cycle 1's winner Adrienne - damn even Robyn got 3 microseconds of airtime this episode

Tyra get off your fucking highhorse and acknowledge Adrienne's existence once and for all

Love Anchal - and if she does get hungry, she can always eat that shit-slice Melrose for lunch - one less smelly bitch in the world (I'd suggest eating Eugena but she hung around crustyy-vagina Monique, so lord knows if anything is still lingering on her)...


Concepcion. Oh my damn. Rich you are so wonderful, did you know? Will you please post a quick video of you breakdancing? I just have this feeling you are the best at it. It would make my day. Thanks!


Nobody puts baby (back ribs) in the corner...

...and expects them to be safe from Anchal.

For those of you who don't think she's a bit too meaty for a "top model," go back to the bouncing booby picture Rich posted previously. Her gut is bouncing right along with 'em. The girl is Keenyah 2.0, just waiting to explode. My mother is overweight and even she only eats ONE egg at a time.

And Tyra looks like she might actually be hiding Janice underneath that dress, hence the Janice face trying to bust out.


Every time I see Mel-stank's haystack mop, a little part of me shrieks and dies. You already look like a muppet honey, you don't need hair to match.

Goddammit I hate her. And I miss Brooke. And Reese and Ryan are breaking up. This... this is what vagina arms do to the world.


"Her arms haven't looked like that since she was a fetus."

Hahaha. I love Brooke. She would have been perfect for Seventeen/Cover Girl. Damn ANTM!!!


CariDee is crazy. And what kind of a name is CariDee anyway??! This show is just getting crazier and crazier! Melrose is probably going to win and she's like 30!!!

Fabio = creepy. Creeeepppyyy. The oldest one of them is 23 and they have this creepy old man licking them and breathing down their necks? What were the people who put this show together thinking? All I could do was shriek wordlessly and randomly yell out 'Creepy!!!!'.


Fabio: I can't believe it's not butter!

My thoughts: I can't believe ANTM is a modeling competition!


Tyra pissed me off so much. She was so cold to Brooke when sending her off. I mean, the girl is sobbing, she went through this freak-show of a competition, jsut to be sent home on the night of her graduation, and all Tyra can say is there are so many other girls who would have traded places with her. I can tell you that I'd rather stay home and graduate high school than be shot down on TV by some vagina-armed egomaniac and a semi-tranny with a bird hairdo. Get over yourself Tyra, and stick some tampons under those armpits!


hilarious! thanks so much for writing these


You are a fucking genious. I live for this shit. I look forward to reading this every week. For me, the Judy Blume cover was the icing on this delicious cake of a recap. I know ANTM is, like, complete trash but I just love it. And yes, I agree, Tyra is out of control. And CariDee is hot and should win! Love ya.


Hahahaha Atooooosa! I'm glad that you get the same kick out of her name as I do!!

And Tyra basically sucks, this episode I don't think she could have been bitchier...

Nice work again!! <3 <3


How many weeks into this season? And I still can't tell CariDee and Melrose apart. I'm so sorry, Misses Frontrunners McStrange-names. It's terribly poliitcally incorrect to admit this, I know, but all pale skinny blonde young women look the same to me.

Why is Jaeda still around? If I hear her talk about her hair ONE MORE TIME, I will reach into my television set and pull out all of her remaining hairs by the roots. Bald Jaeda! No, never mind, that's just too terrifying a mental picture.

And if Anchal talks about being insecure and/or fat one more time...oh, never mind. My love for The Voluptuous One is unshakable. I just mute the television when she starts the whining. Because, let's face it, love is rarely if ever blind, but it *can* be selectively deaf.

And really, does anybody listen to what models say?

I do have to say, though, Rich...paneer thighs? Too funny.

And Dirty Dancing references make me very happy.


Rich, I think we - the fans of your site - need to give Tyra an intervention. Her fashion choices these last two seasons have really worried me and I'm pretty sure that she's lost her damn mind! For a woman who was a MODEL and has a show about MODELS you'd think she'd have better access to wigs, makeup, and clothes than this mess she's always in. It's like she's lost touch w/ reality because looking like a drag queen is not THE LOOK of the pseudo-fashion world she resides in. It's not about her weight, she looks good w/ the weight. But her ugly brown lace front wigs and stage makeup is horrendous. This weeks judging outfit was the last straw. The woman obviously needs some help. It's just too tragic to watch.


CariDee is awesome. And it isn't hard to determine the correct spelling of her name if you just go to the CW website:


Like Pete Burns meets...oh, I don't know...Concepcion from The Incredible Shrinking Woman. Something. Whatever, someone needs to alert Pedro Almodóvar of Sutan's existence like now.

Oh my God that is the most FUCKING HILARIOUS AND RANDOM REFERENCE EVER! Seriously? I thought my partner and I were the only ones who would ever bring up Pete Burns and The Incredible Shrinking Woman ("Goodbye everybody... Goodbye!") in one sentence. GENIUS!

winston for president

Eff yes, she looked hot when she was taking the girls' pics... so what's with the hideousness at panel?! She needs to watch those Cycle 1 DVDs that she's been autographing at Tower Records (or whatever it is now) and realize that the garish outfits and hairdos resembling food are just fug. She tells the girls that a simple wife-beater and jeans will do at panel-- why doesn't she just follow her own advice?! Argh, Ty-Ty.

Anyway, everything positive I've wanted to say about your recap has already been said. BTW, Jay (the orange one, of course!) is hosting Cycle 2 of CNTM. Imagine that!

Oh, Snap

caridee couldn't keep her clothes on if her life depended on it. and that's okay. we love her for that and for her seemingly natural aptitude for being a sexy beer ho in future coors light commercials. oh, who am i kidding? pabst blue ribbon.

love me so carideeeeeeee! homegirl had better take this one home this cycle or i will officially lose my faith in man.


Okay, when you commented on Tyra's dress, I actually laughed out loud in my very quiet serious little office. And that's not the first time you've made me do that.

'The white says, "This is what I would look like if I didn't eat." The gray says, "Pass the mayo."'!?!?!?!

You rock. That is... unless you get me fired for my innapropriate office outbursts. Then you suck for being such a funny bitch.


Concepcion...Fabio...Judy Blume. My new sacred triple. Best. Recap. Ever.

Steven C

omg, i googled antm looking for more folks angry with what the heck has been going on with the show recently, and instead I'm falling off my chair from all your photo commentary / photoshopped bizness.


Ha. Love it, as always. I was hoping you would have an animation of Miss Jay trying not to fall asleep while Tyra was doing her general "two beautiful girls stand before me" shpil. Classic.


Is it just me, or do Amanda and Michelle look exactly like Robin Tunny circa the Craft years? Seriously, I just turned on the TV and the Craft was on TBS, and I was all, "Huh, I didn't know Amanda/Michelle had a movie career before ANTM."


I LOOOOOVE you! You make me laugh sooo much! What am I gonna do when top model is over?!?!?! I'll miss your review more than the show!!!!

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