Project terminated

As sort of a reward to myself for the hours I spent writing about the show over the course of its third season, I will not be recapping the final episode of Project Runway. I'm tired, it's over and besides, there really wasn't much material worth mining in the finale episode. Trying to pull a long-form recap out of 20 minutes of kindness and runway collections would be like trying to pull blood out of a Harry Winston. I'm not sure that anyone cares at this point; I'm positive that I don't. It seems mighty pointless, now that the show is over, to be grabbing a .gif of Laura's runway strut, or illustrating the trash dump that Park Pleating must be (Sanford & Son? Ha!), or wondering aloud about exactly what Laura was questioning if it wasn't Jeffrey's integrity, or putting a sound file of "wowness" up or giving Michael the Lagerfeldian fan he's shrieking for in this shot:

Well, OK. Fine.

How could I possibly resist? I am human, you know.

Anyway, I will say that unlike Winston and 95 percent of viewers, I like that Jeffrey won. Uli's collection was stronger and Laura's had higher highs, but from a purely in-it-for-the-drama POV, I like that the ultra-prick took it all without ever really redeeming himself (save the scant instances of damage control that I pointed out). It was ballsy on the part of the judges/producers, and the mass outrage in its wake has been entertaining, as well. Again, purely in it for the drama.

So yay.

Oh, and I do have this for you: Heidi's brief discussion with John Fleming, EVP and CMO of Wal-Mart (Stores Division)...

...has produced your new ringtone. It's her response when he said any of the designers working for Wal-Mart was "always a possibility." Nice wheeze, Heids. Hear it in motion. This will be your final ProjRun new ringtone, sniff, sniff. Think of me when you get that booty call. Lowenstein, Lowenstein.

(Thanks to Rachel for pointing that one out.)

I have to give a big, well-mannered thank you to Blogging Project Runway, whose beyond-generous authors have never wavered in their support of my blog, no matter how profane, disgusting or uncalled for my recaps were. You guys are seriously too good to me.

Finally, thanks to the readers. Thanks for your emails and comments, especially the ones calling me on my shit. I can't say I really regret anything I've included in these recaps, but dissent is the roadway to thinking and understanding that I appreciate the most.

It's been fun, guys.

Comments

[John]

thanks for the season of re-caps! xoxo

[Christine]

Well, as disappointed as I am that there isn't a full recap, I totally understand. I mean...SIGH. Jeffrey? Yeah, ProjRun has killed my love for reality tv b.s.

My love for Tim Gunn, and Rich, remains.

[aubyn]

you always make my day with your recaps and you have, as usual, captured my mood with this final one. the allegations against jeffrey only succeeded in making me root for him and angered me in it's obvious final attempt to mine drama from a really boring season. take some time and relax.

[goawayjaeda]

You make it sound like you're going to die.

[Shot of Love]

Maybe not that you're going to die, but that you're moving to the British Virgin Islands to run a catamaran rental shop on the beach and retiring the website. Really, I got a little panicky for a second.

[Stormy70]

We will always have ANTM to knock around.
I thought Uli and Laura had the best collections, but I am just the plebe of the real world, with my dollars tainted by the scent of an actual job.

[Shot of Love]

But yeah, it's reeeaaallly over. Christ, they're not even replaying it on Bravo anymore. Hey, Rich, have you considered putting a "search" feature on your site? I don't know how much work it would be, but I was digging for your review of "You and Me and Everyone We Know" the other day, and thought of it.

[Rich]

Well, you know, for a lot of people, there's no reason to visit fourfour anymore. So, this is mostly for them, I guess (?).

Of course I'm not going anywhere.

[Lisa V]

We may have come for PR, but we are staying because of the talent.

[Nightingale]

Well, the show's over and Winston summed it up the best anyway. I want to thank you for all the laughs. I appreciate your efforts in putting these recaps together all for our amusement. Rich, you are a dear, and I will keep fourfour on my list of favorites.
Sincerely, Ms. Nightingale

[sarah d.]

I came for Winston and Rudy and by god, I'm staying for them. Them and ANTM. J'adore fourfour.

[craig]

it's been fabulous xo

[Arthur James]

I knew Jeffrey was going to win. I read it on his neck. Thanks for the recaps! You deserve a break today.

[Carrie]

Thank you so much for all of the wonderful recaps. I love the show, but as has been said before, I almost love reading your recaps even more than the show itself. Only started reading this season, but I am going back and watching season 2 (I'd only seen the second half) and will be reading your previous recaps along the way.

Can't wait for next season.

[AG]

I've loved all of your recaps and my interest in the actual show hath waned with thine own. Thank you for the hot screencaps, your dedication to quality product, Winston, Little Vinnie's Snacks, that crazy Rudy Cat and the ever-changing banner of cultural references.

You deserve a break!!!

lovexoxoxooxxoxo,

ass-licking Andre Gunn

[e.i.]

Thank you, sir! These recaps are a great public service. I give you five big Catherine Malandrino stars! * * * *

I'm glad Jeffrey won. His collection was the best, in my opinion.

[David]

thank you so much for your work over the course of this season; you've made Project Runway twice as enjoyable for me and my friends this year.

PS - hooray for Jeffrey! whooo!

[licoricepirate]

*cries*

[theidlereceptionist]

Your recaps will be sorely missed, even though I just stumbled (apparently out from under a cold, damp rock) upon your site. Thank goodness there's still the ANTM recapz to look forward to.

Bravo, sir.

[neurot]

I am joining the list of fans who want to thank you for your great reacaps. Your blog is the best. Keep up the great work.
PS- Jeffrey! Hurray!

[Killorn]

BOO! Your recaps are better than the show itself.

[Bleh]

I think you just didn't have time to recap it and this is a cop-out.

[adam Durand]

You don't need to contastly make excuses for posting something or not! Just do it or don't.

Either way, people will come back here because you are a fantastic writer!

[rod]

carry on

[JadeFan]

We all know the Vagina Arms and Ham is the reason most of us read.