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I used that PTA line myself when, erm, talking to my tv last week after the previews.
also, thank you for taking Anchal to task for the dozen-eggs-for-breakfast-thing. Either bitch about your size or eat a Grand Slam, but not both.


Yay Rich! Until you do right by me, everything you think about gon' fail! hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!


yay, i'm the first to comment!

i love your blog. it's how i keep up with the shows i love but can't watch here in s. korea until it's subtitled two seasons later.

i laughed so hard, i tooted. thanks


Yay for Anchal's bouncing boobies!


Yay! Top Model recap for the week is here at last :) Loved the Melrose as an alpaca! Totally suits her :) Can't wait to hear what you say next week about Twin #2 "shocking confession" (ie: "She might be gay")...dun dun dunnnnn


Rock and Roll!


I can't wait either!

And seriously, when I got to the picture of Jaeda sitting in "confessional," I honestly thought it was a man. For like, ten seconds. I thought, what is going on that they have a nearly naked man joining them? Seeeeeriously.

But thanks for the wonderful posts. Again!


hilarious...but that mother theresa thing scared the shit out of me.


Pissed my diaper! Great recap, Rich!


Thank you for your blog!


Sweet! I am early!


What about the coming out party in the promo for next week? Was that Michelle saying "I think that I might be gay."?


oh i love my brooke - i always knew she reminded me of reese, but for some reason i had totally blocked out the "election" reference - right on! rock and rock, rip megg, we'll miss you, but at least we still have caridee for crazy.


Hurrah! I'm the one who pointed out the crying count discrepancy! And Hurrah! Melrose was just like crying! My girl doesn't cry!

I'm sorry Rich, but I have to disagree, Melrose is so beyond awesome its like not even funny. She's like you would be if you were on ANTM.

But irregardless I have to also disagree, Anchal hangs out with the mensa club of AJ, the "edgy" goth girl, I can't wait to hear her tell us she loves electroclash, Megg, ms. rawk n roll, and Caridee, who although adorable, was probably just there because someone told her there were free cigarettes or someting. Melrose hangs out with the twins. And we all know how hard it is to be friends with twins. My best friend in high school was an identical twin, but I was like not even cool enough to be friends with BOTH of them at the same time.

Anyways, I still love Melrose because I'm pro drama.

I am in hysterics over your tyraism collection.

Oh and "you want to put her on a cupcake" is so pseudopotes, do you think maybe Atoosa reads potes? Would that be like life imitating art imitating life imitating a cupcake? Or something?

Do you smell what I'm stepping in? Because I'm having trouble figuring it out.

Anyways, America's Next Top Alpaca for the win!


amazing recap.

i have fallen deeply in love with caridee. more more more!

and is it just me or have the photo shoots this season been ALL just horrendous? i think the NEW CW is killing the creativity.


I think Anchal might be the fakest bitch they've ever had on this show. All the crocodile tears for what? If there was anything really bad, or even somewhat bad, said about her in the hot tub, it was cut in editing. And she can't even cry convincingly. She's so fake, she's even too fake to model. And talk about being a one-note... Has she said anything yet other than "I'm not pretty wah wah wah"? I can't stand her.

And that Atoosa woman irritated the hell out of me, too. Can't put my finger on it, but I wanted to change the channel every time she was on.

Stacey, on the other hand, she may not have a pretty face, but she sounds like a good egg. Makes one of her.

Does anyone else think the photo shoots this season are really inferior? Mr. Jay is losing his edge. Or maybe he's got a new man and doesn't care about the show anymore. If he leaves, I'm not watching anymore. He's my favourite. Him and Nigel Barker.

Bah. I miss Season Two.


Rich, you constantly delight me, but this just blows me away. The needlepoint/alpaca/Thing/Saw comparisons are genius!


Spot on about "old Melrose/diaper pee Lisa." I totally thought that. Of course, I never hated Lisa. She was crazzzzy, but not a bitch. *Clears Throat...Melrose*

This is one of your best recaps.

Gretchen Weiners

Cross-stitch? Alpacas? You are ridiculous. That Mona Lisa is truly terrifying. Thank you.


Stacie is a woman? A *natural* born woman? are you sure, because I don't know....

anyway, brilliant as always. why the hell won't the CW give us close ups? (WTF, man!)


Haha I think I laughed for five minutes collectively from reading this recap...ok more than five minutes, but that's aside the point. I look forward to seeing how Janice handles Brooke's question...and to see you recap it, of course!!

But yeah, the needlepoint/alpaca/thing comparisons were GENIUS...oh my goodness. Excellent work! =)


thank you for the Lita Ford "Kiss Me Deadly" reference. I'm going to have that song in my head all day long now.

Even though it wasn't mentioned in your recap, I loved when Twiggy didn't realize Jaeda's abs were painted on. Poor ignorant Twigs.

Penny Woods

Watch out, Rich. Atoosa will get revenge on you through her MySpace blog. Because the Toos wants everyone to be "healed" from all the "vicious" gossip spread about her.


OMG! Rich, you are totally right about Caridee's trunk. I didn't notice when I watched the show, but it is upside down. I love your keen eye!

BTW, I love Anchal, but the whole low self-esteem schtick has got to go! I hate to tell these girls that having boudatious tatas does not equal fat.


The sheer randomness of your recaps are hilarious. I mean, the Google image searches! One never knows where you'll end up with the stream-of-conscious blogging. Y'know, the thing I do give Tyra credit for is that fact that she's pretty wise to the industry, i.e. just sell the fucking product. And I LOVE that she just *can't* get over Naomi's bitchery 15 yrs ago. It's gonna be on her tombstone - "Tyra Banks -1973-2034. I have feelings, Naomi!" Enough with putting the twins together.

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