We're around the midpoint between ANTM cycles and waaaaaah! I miss it. I've been following Canada's Next Top Model every week via torrents -- though I haven't been much inspired to blog about it, I really do love it. Go...uh...girl with the red hair and blunt cut whose name I can't remember and won't look up for fear of spoiling this week's episode for myself (I haven't watched it yet).
Anyway, Liz of Liz Is Working sent me an email titled, "Awesome ANTM involving hot dogs," that inspired this post. As much I was hoping that someone had cracked open Natasha's head so we could see her Oscar Mayers once and for all, I wasn't disappointed when that turned out to not be the case.
But first: some where are they now (or, if you like abbreviations, WATN) for background. It's hard out there for a former ANTM contestant, but I think it might be getting a bit easier. Cycle 5 Bre's in some commercial I haven't seen and Cycle 2's Mercedes is slangin' for Chili's. Jaslene is on the cover of Latina, which is a pretty fucking big deal.
(Source: topmodel LiveJournal)
I also read (probably on that LiveJournal, as well, so take it with a grain of salt even though it's often correct) that she's been tapped to be the face of Eve's Fetish label when it relaunches. Anyway, at the very, it would seem to counter the "ANTM winner's curse" shit people like to talk about.
Also, Cycle 7's Eugena has been working for South Pole for a while (she had a huge billboard up in Times Square earlier this year for months). She's in the latest Vibe posing with Mario:
I only wish that she were posing with Ne-Yo in some sort of ANTM-inspired celebrity-doppelganger setup.
Oh, and Mollie Sue shot a Diesel campaign...not that you can tell that it's her in the picture, or anything.
But of course, for every success (of a most likely temporary nature as this business moves fast!), there are about 5,000 signs of struggling from other girls on the show. Cycle 2's Shandi and Cycle 8's Kathleen resurfaced in this fredflare.com thingy looking like rat on ass and ass on rat, respectively.
(Thanks to karenzero for the heads-up.)
And then there was the shoot Cycle 1's Robin did, in which she posed in various churchy hats like the princess of the throne she is (she and Monique, alike):
Admit it: one look at these had you lustin'.
And who could forget Cycle 6 Joanie's turn as a wig model, the subject of many a chortle at the Television Without Pity forums:
Up till Liz's email, I thought that this was the worst post-ANTM, semi-public gig recorded. And then I saw a picture that Liz took at Coney Island on July 4...
It's Sara, she of Persian descent and Cycle 2, counting hot dogs at the famous (and revolting) Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest (this shot comes from Liz's Flickr account). And perhaps also modeling a wig, herself. Remember how her dad equated modeling with prostitution? Surely this, then, is the equivalent of mopping up semen at a porno theater. Slutacious!
This picture makes me saaaaad, which sucks. ANTM is supposed to make me feel better about myself!
Wooow! That's gotta suck. She look like a part of her has died in that picture.
Where's Wholahay? That's what I really wanna know.
Posted by: Anika | July 13, 2007 at 02:11 PM
Awww. A wig model. Hell, I guess work is work.
How quickly we forget? For a moment there, I was like who in the hell is Kathleen. Then I remembered she was the one that talked like she was a little touched in the head.
Posted by: felipe anuel | July 13, 2007 at 02:14 PM
Oh Sara...
Posted by: deeyou | July 13, 2007 at 02:23 PM
:(
sara was my favorite from all cycles
i guess it hard out there for a pimp
when i saw the chilli's comercial w mercedes i wished i had your number to call you rich!
Posted by: j.talia | July 13, 2007 at 02:31 PM
Shandi was on a VH1 special a little bit ago and she's like a professional karoake singer or somethin now? Or just doing the karoake for fun? I was pretty sure she wasn't modeling anymore...poor Sara, hopefully the dude she was counting didn't have a "reversal"...I saw that on espn and almost puked myself...it's like being a boxing ring girl except disgusting!!
Posted by: Anne | July 13, 2007 at 02:37 PM
we gotta wash that last picture out otherwise the after taste might stay..
http://www.imdb.com/gallery/hh/1516031/HH/1516031/iid_1237494.jpg?path=pgallery&path_key=Racey-Tabrizi,%20Sara
http://www.cabanacachaca.com/events/images/invite_lg/2006-09-28_sara_tabrizi.jpg
i stan for sara
Posted by: sarai | July 13, 2007 at 02:39 PM
Sara looks like a better version of Paris Hilton in that picture.
It was meant to be a compliment but i guess it didnt come out as one...
Posted by: | July 13, 2007 at 02:42 PM
Jaslene alert: US Weekly July 2, 2007--is dating Jeremy Piven. Same article reports Jeremy kissing Melrose.
Is this the Nathan's Hotdogs/Wig Modeling or cover of Latina end of the ANTM scale?
Posted by: kate | July 13, 2007 at 02:43 PM
Rich, you need a separate 800 number or pager thing for all your fans, so when we see pop culture in person we can immediately contact the mothership (you).
Posted by: Leanne | July 13, 2007 at 02:46 PM
I also think you should go back and do episode recaps of ANTM cycles 1-3, as those were the ones I never saw. You can see them sporadically on VH1, but without your witty comments, they ring hollow. Any chance of hooking that up as an early bday present to me????
Posted by: Leanne | July 13, 2007 at 02:53 PM
Oh Rich, I love your recaps, but you've made it look like the girls are all doing nothing. I mean...yeah 99% of them are doing nothing.
But some of them are doing well.
Cycle 1's Elyse is modeling up a storm in Hong Kong (the rumored locale of cycle 9...which might make for a cool flashback to the shit slice confessional).
Cycle 2's Shandi is working as a DJ. That's not a modeling related thing, but still...she's not doing professional karaoke....
Cycle 2's Yoanna is always on the Style Network doing something.
Cycle 3's Eva has an EXTREMELY outdated ad at the covergirl makeup section of my walmart. Someone put sample lipstick on her. I think its been that way for a year at least now. Love those dedicated Walmart employees! Okay so she's not doing anything either.
Cycle 4's Michelle was on the Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency. Which is like a super huge deal...umm...okay, no not really.
Cycle 5's Nicole allegedly has this huge modeling campaign with a designer I've never heard of who is allegedly huge. But like I said I never heard of him/her.
Cycle 6's Mollie Sue has been in like all the foreign vogues. Which, when you think of it, is more exciting than being in American Vogue, because you don't have to compete with pictures of Nicole Richie and Lindsay Lohan pretending to be fashionistas.
Cycle 7's Melrose has another big name contract with some allegedly big name designer that I've also never heard of.
Who else...
Oh yeah...
Cycle 3's Yaya was in an Old Navy commercial and had a big huge cut out of herself pasted in my local Old Navy's store window.
So see. You were right, the best we can hope for is hot dog bitches and Blanche Deveraux Wigs from these girls.
Posted by: matt | July 13, 2007 at 03:04 PM
Gawd, Joanie looks about 40 in that picture. A 40 year old Dolly Parton imitator.
Robin's hat looks like a Ring Pop.
Posted by: jelodi97 | July 13, 2007 at 03:11 PM
There was a scary pic of Jaslene in last week's In Touch (I think, or was it Us? I get them confused). She looked much more emaciated than usual, worse than pre-preggers Nicole.
Posted by: n | July 13, 2007 at 03:23 PM
Why does Robin look so different? Does she have colored contacts in or did she get some work done or something? Does anyone else see this?
Posted by: juliet | July 13, 2007 at 03:30 PM
Rich -
You forgot the most exciting of all! My boyfriend works for Swiss Colony in Wisconsin and one of their divisions is a clothing line devoted to African American women. Yes, there are several things wrong with that. Why is a sausage and cheese company shilling women's clothes? Don't ask me. Even worse, the catalog is call Ashro. No, I'm not kidding.
Anyway, Danielle is like the FACE of Ashro. She's all up in that catalog. Like on EVERY page. Apparently, she's the most expensive model of color they could afford or something.
Hey, at least she's not shilling the cheese!
Posted by: sonny | July 13, 2007 at 03:35 PM
Just a bit more info. The company's website is www.ashro.com. You can find pics of Danielle (or Dani as she's been renamed) but you have to do a bit of searching. Poor dear.
Posted by: sonny | July 13, 2007 at 03:38 PM
I thought I was seeing things re: the Chili's ad. Thanks for the confirmation.
Posted by: kdub | July 13, 2007 at 03:47 PM
I thought I was seeing things re: the Chili's ad. Thanks for the confirmation.
Posted by: kdub | July 13, 2007 at 03:47 PM
But seriously, WHERE IS JADE???
Posted by: Shannon | July 13, 2007 at 03:47 PM
Also saw Yohanna on an infomercial with Alyssa Milano for a new face cream/blusher thing. In the vein of the Proactive commercials where Alyssa sits around repeating "Amazing, ABsolutely aMAZing!" Yohanna is the before and after facial shot of the skin tone. I can't decide if the extra skin around her mouth makes her look anorexic or just old. Please please please please go back and recap the old episodes!!!
Posted by: Leanne | July 13, 2007 at 03:47 PM
WOW - at first, i thought that was elyse scarfing down the dogs!
Posted by: LorettaSwit | July 13, 2007 at 04:06 PM
ASHRO! Now, that would be a catalog I'd like to see.
Posted by: liz | July 13, 2007 at 04:23 PM
Why does Eugena have a wicket waste basket on her thighs?
Also, the Lupus girl is doing a Chili's commercial.
Thanks for this, as always.
Posted by: Julia | July 13, 2007 at 04:29 PM
A few months back, while strolling along Melrose Ave., I happened upon Miss Joanie herself working at some type of arty toy shop or another. She was very friendly (not to mention beautiful), but I couldn't help but feel badly for her. I mean, I worked on Melrose Ave. once as well, but I was 18 years-old at the time and not a reality show reject. Life's a bitch.
Posted by: georgia | July 13, 2007 at 04:32 PM
Hey, at least we know Sara can count. That's saying something. Jaslene looks kick ass on that cover! And I agree with Leanne, PLEASE recap old episodes. Since MTV & VH1 show the marathons all the time, it would be so nice. Can't wait for next cycle!!!
Posted by: Gwen | July 13, 2007 at 04:53 PM