Bit off more than I can chew?

David Lynch via INLAND EMPIRE has hijacked my pop-culture time and, most importantly, my brain this week. Hopefully I'll have something to show for it tomorrow. In the meantime, I have but meager offerings in the form of suggestions:

WATCH: This:

Fascist Atlantic Records keeps removing this video, Jomanda's "Got a Love for You," from YouTube. The one that's up now is shitty and out of sync. That's why I'm turning to good, old, ignored DailyMotion for this nicely encoded version. I've wondered many times if this is my favorite song of all time, and every time I say to myself, "God, Rich, don't be so definitive," I eventually end up listening to it again and realizing that it is indeed my favorite song of all time. The video is to the early '90s (all plastic and polka-dotted and baggy and safe-sex promoting) what Beyond the Valley of the Dolls was to the early '70s, if BVD were selectively colored and set to a throbbing house beat. Talk about definitive! I can't wait until hipster fashion catches up to this shit -- I salivate for the day when spandex onesies with suspenders are once again fashionable for men. In fact, I might get one this weekend to help kick that off.

I've uploaded this track before, but here it is again, just in case you need it. I couldn't live with myself knowing you were going without:

Jomanda "Got a Love for You (Hurley's House Mix)"

READ: Stylus' feature on the history of freestyle. Written by my friend Michael Gill, it's as straightforward and comprehensive of a chronicle of the genre as you're likely to read anywhere. The 50 Essential Tracks list is spot-on, but what tickles me the most is that shot of Carlos Berrios in a puke-yellow wife-beater on the beach. How much you wanna bet that if the camera pulled back, it would reveal Carlos to be rocking a spandex onsie? Trailblazer!

TROLL: 90's R&B Junkie - Speaking of throwbacks, this blog aims to go through each and every No. 1 R&B track of the '90s, providing critiques and context for each song. It's brought to you by the guy who runs Mixtape Maestro, and the writing is uniformly solid and informed. One downside is that the writer doesn't believe in MP3 distribution (these songs need to LIVE, damn it!), but that's made up for by YouTube and/or audio embeds. And, really, if you don't know how to get your hands on free files of any of this stuff, you probably don't belong on the Internet anyway. It's great to read about Boyz II Men's "Uhh Ahh" or fucking Tracie Spencer's "Tender Kisses" in 2007, but it's also nice that via this blog, the image of Ruby Turner gets to live again:

A public service, if ever there was.

CRUSH ON: YouTube's roccigiovanniberrini, whom, I'm thinking, has to be one of the most appealing men in the world right now. He lists himself under YouTube's comedy tag, and while I've never busted a gut or anything, he's amusing enough. But mostly, he's just dreamy with great eyebrows and palpable Midwestern kindness. He records a lot of his observational rambles shirtless, and even though his camera stays focused on his head and neck (you don't even get so much as a nipple), that's still hot. Even hotter, per his newest video, he totally sees the advantage of bisexuality, even though it "isn't for him" (come on, Rocci, the fruity spelling of your name suggests otherwise!):

I think I like YouTube talking-head-type shit because it feels like I'm consuming pop culture (and therefore "working"), and yet, it's ultimately mindless. It's soothing almost. Rocci gives me nice daydreams.

UNDERSTAND: Like many a Lynch character, I live in terror. The only thing that haunts me more than the shot of Winston at the top of this post is Winston himself. You'll notice that a lot of the "Winston" coverage lately has revolved around food because, seriously, that's all that Winston's into. I've explained it before, but he and Rudy are obsessed because we don't give them dry food (it just isn't good for them, especially with Winston's IBS past). But now I understand why people do: it gets your cats to leave you the fuck alone. Blocks of cheese, celery, hamburger rolls, butter knives, lollipops, popcorn, fucking ANYTHING THAT'S EDIBLE cannot be left around these cats, who feel like they have to hunt for everything since they're only fed twice a day. I've stopped counting the times that Rudy has broken the skin on the hand that feeds him. Winston will eat something, say a dehydrated chicken cat treat, and then bite my finger after it's gone, just to make sure it's really gone. One of the few things Winston's tiny, barely functioning brain has been able to absorb is the sound of a foil top coming off yogurt. I know that once I open yogurt, it's only a matter of time before Winston comes running in with his hoarse demands. The anticipation seizes me with fear sometimes when it's really late. It's like Jaws. I know what it is to live every week like it's Shark Week.

Comments

[Sean]

I can't imagine a song that would get a bigger rise out of me on the dance floor than Jomanda. It's just so mind-blowingly good.

P.S. Is that a young Donald Faison buried in the middle of the opening man-montage?

OMG Was that a 30 Rock reference towards the end?

[Jess]

I agree that the Rocci guy is cute, but the way he speaks reminds me of Dane Cook and that's a baaad thing.

[Merkin]

Really showing my age and lack of taste here: I had a spandex onesie back in the day. It was black with a magenta diagonal stripe across the chest and a yellow exclamation point on the thigh, and not quite as low cut as the one on the guy in the Jomanda video. If I still had it, Rich, I'd FedEx it to you so you could get fresh at the weekend.

[yungrii]

here in seattle hipsters are definitely orbiting Real World 1 fashion senses quite dangerously.

[brandy]

We feed our cat dry food in small portions only twice a day and he still comes after us.
He LOVES beer and tomato sauce.
We don't give him beer but sometimes he just licks the side of the glass or bottle it's in. But we know if we left it he would stick his head in our pints in a second.
So it's not because you feed them wet food it's because some cats just have greedy guts.

[Suz]

I know what you mean about the cats and food. It's like "Children of the Corn" around here whenever a can (doesn't matter what it is) is opened.

[finding the filth]

thanks for posting the video. it's like i'm 15 all over again.

i feel like sneaking out tonight and heading over to disco2000 at the limelight.

[MizoFizo]

Does it get any better than Got A Love For You? Anyone who doesn't enjoy that song might as well just die right now because it's impossible to enjoy life without enjoying that song...

[Pook]

My cats get dry food and one of them will eat anything you put in front of him. The other one will only be interested in human food if it is an empty tuna can. He likes the metal taste mixed with tuna juice apparently.

[Lea]

You think Winston is bad. Imagine the hoarse demands but not really wanting anything. The only thing my cat eats is dry cat food (free-feed) and bonito flakes (one a day) but that doesn't stop her from begging for food everytime I'm in the kitchen just to have her smell it and walk away. Fickly Bitch.

[Lea]

Fickly=Fickle

[Daniel]

I like fickly better.

[Jen]

Rocci is boring. Winston is amazing. I love him and I think you are a genuis. I think that everytime I read your blog but I'm not sure I tell you enough. You are just wonderful and I'm so glad you write (here and everywhere else you post).

[Henry Evil]

Rich I know you love your Bre, so I thought you should see this: http://youtube.com/watch?v=X6sg5YgDG5s

[Danielle]

You blogging Lynch. So you are telling me my dream has come true?

[milkyaqua]

My cat would wait for us to finish eating dinner and lo, if you put your plate down (since we were eating in front of the TV) if he wouldn't come around and lick it clean (no matter what had been on it). He loved milk from cereal (refused to drink it straight from the carton), licking empty yogurt and ice cream containers. He also loved fried chix. The only way to enjoy the meal and finish the chix was to put him outside (leaving him inside just insured that one of us would trip over him and kill ourselves) and he would meow the whole time. Afterwards, he would get the gizzards.

[Flaquita]

I haven't heard "Got a Love for You" since junior high, and I remembered every single word. For someone so well versed in house, I'd swear you were from Chicago.

[Em]

I've also been watching Inland Empire and I'm currently trying to forumulate how the fuck I'm going to respond to it in my own blog. Interested to see what you think of it.

[Gyn]

Dreams do come true! Rich blogging Lynch and poses with Bret Michaels all in the same day!
Gonna celebrate with a Blue Velvet, Eraserhead, then Inland Empire marathon.

[spiffy]

Don't feel bad, Rich. I have two dogs, and they are worse. They feel completely entitled to at least taste everything the humans in the house would eat. I've resorted to eating in my car before I go home, just so I won't have to eat in front of them and be pestered to share. Sad, ain't it?

As much as I know it'll hurt, I can't help but wanting to stick my finger in Winston's mouth just to feel what those cute tiny little incisors would do.

[SuperChris]

Oh my God, I love that Jomanda song....I actually still have the CD-single that I bought years ago at a used store...

I love love love your blog and it's possible we may have the exact same taste in music.

Ciao,
Chris

[Kathy]

Actually, as cute as I find Winston, his incisors scare me.

Our cats get wet and dry food, and our little piggle still cries almost constantly whenever we're in the kitchen or dining room. His thing seems to be *new* food - like, if it's been five minutes since I gave it to them, it's too old. Hmm...maybe I could just pick their food bowls up and put them back down every five minutes and fool him into accepting it. But that'd be too much work, and he's a little chubster anyway, so it's not like he needs to eat more.

[LaSexorcisto]

I always love reminiscing about the forgotten gems that Rich keeps posting in here. "Got a Love for You" still sounds so f-in' good! Definitely it takes me back to the early days of the Real World and that makes me a little misty-eyed and slightly depressed. Damn you Father Time.

Rocci is boring as hell, but he looks dumb enough to be talked into the whole bisexual thing.

[Akbar Fazil]

Winston is not alone in his yogurt opening tracking ablities. My cat is the same.

He has even gotten so good that he knows the sound of the fridge closing followed by the spoon drawer sound and knows it is yogurt time.