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winston for president

And if you haven't checked out these YouTube vids yet, I present:


The link is mediatakeout, but they have youtube clips as proof


Does anyone see the striking resemblance between Chantal and Jon Benet Ramsey?


Jenah’s teeth gave the CG commercial away.


Have been lurking forever, finally compelled to comment, etc etc.

Tootie made me want to throw up every time she did her damn excited "adorable" jumping around thing. How did no one punch her, or look at her pictures and not laugh? I know this show isn't about actually finding good models but her winning REALLY cemented that. No going back now. May as well let, I don't know, a plus size person with no spark win next time, Tyra! Still, thankyou Tyra for the joy that was Heather. And Chantal's wonkiness. The only way for her to look symmetrical would be to stand next to Paris Hilton. And I still maintain that pre-makeover Jenah looks like dead-ex-girlfriend April in the movie Rent.

Your recaps are GOLD, Rich - I get them on a Tuesday morning (being in New Zealand/diff timezone) and always look forward to what you've got to display next. Thanks for making this cycle HILARIOUS.


When Jenah was talking about how she felt she shouldn't have to spew rainbows incessantly thing, I was praying she would say to Tyra "Look at Naomi Campbell. She's a bitch and still gets jobs, and you talk about her all the time." Snap!


Saliesha: WORST. WINNER. EVER. Seriously. I can't stand her. Did she even take a single really good picture? And I don't mean the heavily photoshopped one at the great wall. However, the recaps were wonderful....I think I'm done with the show, I'll just read the recaps from now on :-)


Love your recaps!!
Thank you for pointing out Jaslene's "Oh my god, God!" line. I had to pause the TiVo to laugh at that part... you can like, maybe recap...Project Runway... 'n' stuff?


I was so hoping you'd touch on the fact that Jenah's feet looked like she had a picnic in dog sh!t.

Great recap! See you on the next cycle!

Cookie Crawford

I think the way to pick the winner in the last elimination is to note how the producers have dressed the girls. The loser is always styled WAY frumpier! (Natasha, Kahlen...Chantal.)

And Tyrant proved this competition was all just a pile of horse pucky when she said Jenah "consistently took gorgeous pictures that rival some of the top models today." (Then cut her loose, of course.) WTF? What's a competition like this ABOUT, if it isn't rivaling existing top models?

Jenah was toadish in her way, but -- with a stretch -- the most classically modelesque.


"WORST FINAL 3 EVER!!!" Totally agree! Those Cover Girl pics were nowhere near Danielle and Joanie's, my 2 all time favorites!


it is balm to my shrivelled, ball-bag-shaped soul that i can now conjure up your voice in my head while watching "crowned," reading this new variety of bitches their riot-act due. and yes, i'm off to go fashion a tinfoil philip treacy hat.


Rich, this is ecctv/liz, I mod over at ONTD and we love you too. We love, adore, worship you.
I don't know what I'll do now that ANTM is off the air, what will you recap? ProjRun? That beauty pageant show?


Only one correction to your otherwise brilliant recap: STEPHANIE was the girl who said "how rude!" in Full House. Not the Olsen twins, who hardly even spoke during the run of Full House.

When I read the part about you finding yourself by remembering your masturbatory childhood...I dunno what to say how I felt, let's just say it was a magical moment.

The eagle thing was equally magical.


I can totally see a Future Vagina Arms of America commercial. 30 seconds of vagina arms, maybe 10 seconds of a professional voice actor telling us how to prevent this model-esque disease, and no bad acting, shills from CoverGirl and appearances at Wal-Mart.


Hi Rich,

This would seem like a really good time and place for some out-of-the-blue appreciation, but, then, I'm not actually sure there is a really bad time for such things, either.

In any case. My wife and I both love your blog (it must make you feel so good to know you are reaching out to the desperately-straight community), and we don't even own a television. I, however, used to watch the show on a packed couch in my old collective, where everyone but one (making it all the better, but also slightly awkwarder) enjoyed the marvellous joke that is everything about ANTM. Living in Scandinavia does nothing to alleviate the absurdity or inconsequentiality of the whole thing, let me tell you, and the general retardation rings clear and true across the ocean.

Anyway. Not the point! We love you! Thank you!

David (and Hiroko)


I asked by boyfriend's kid (girl, age 8) which finalist she thought would win and she said, "that one (points at selesha)"
i asked why, and she said, " cause the white girls never win"

true story.


Even before any spoilers came out I figured Tootie would win.. it had been too long since a black girl had won. I understand they want to show to represent all types of beauty, but it's freaking sad the way you can line up all the winners and see oh at this cycle they realized they hadn't had a black girl in a while. We must find one to win!


Great write-ups as always, see you next season!


Rich, great recaps this season. Even though they were born from tragedy, the video recaps were AWESOME!

Although the wig catalog photos portray Saleisha's past work, I'm pretty sure those photos represent her future job prospects as well. "America's Next Top Marginally Employed Catalog Model" indeed.


I think if the 'Black and White' video was remade, it should be the "kiss my fat ass" Tyra morphing into thin Tyra

Miss Lisa

GAAAH! That shot of Miss Jay had me reaching for my stash of Vicodin (thank god I parsed it out cautiously throughout the past year). How did he pack that wig? Wouldn't Customs have been suspicious? It looks dangerous.

Birds eating Tyra's hair: worth suffering through the entire season for. Looking at the image of Jenah's feet will require more Vicodin. That closing shot of Tyra looks remarkably like Joan Crawford in her last film, "TROG." Maybe Tyra's future is secure in z-grade horror films...? Co-starring Miss Jay of course.
Thanks Rich. You made it so much better than ever before.


I forget this show is on sometimes. It's like people who still follow Smashing Pumpkins. Like, really? Wha? But thanks Rich for giving these bitches the Photoshops they deserve! And for making fun of Tyra.


Thanks Rich for another great season of catty recaps. The time you put into these is much appreciated! x


I guess I'm the only one who liked cycle 7 (cmon, how could you not love Caridee and the twins? By that I mean Amanda and Michelle and not Caridee's breasts altho I'm sure they are cute.) The last two have been meh tho-only Natasha and Dionne rescued the last cycle.

The final 3 were a yawn all the way around this time for me. I knew Chantal had no chance but I was pulling for her for feeling so bad about tripping stilts guy (more so when Tyra asked if she felt bad or wanted to keep going. What was that shit about?) I'm fairly convinced without you I'd have no reason to continue watching. Except I am glad Twiggy is camera loving history. She actually made me miss Janice. Which, damn.

You know, now that this cycle is over you could......recap Project Runway. Don't yell at me, it's just a suggestion. At any rate, we'll still lurve you.

I knoe how too spel

I'm overjoyed at the "Oh my god, God" inclusion. I honestly thought I'd heard it wrong. And since, in a rage, I deleted the ep off of my teevee, I couldn't replay it to be sure. Thanks, Rich.

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