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February 13, 2008



Is it just me or does the background music sound like it's the karaoke version of what the REAL music is supposed to be?
My favorite line is, "I'm gonna treat you like a teddy bear, you won't wanna go nowhere." Oh, Mariah!
House of Jules


Amazing. I don't like Mariah but I thought, ok, I'll go listen out of curiosity and because I like Rich, his writing style, Winston ;)....lo and behold, I like this song. Who'd a thunk it?

I still won't go out and buy it but thank you for helping me to see I can be wrong sometimes *grin*


UGH.. I didn't like Mariah when she was shrieking at me in the 90s and I don't like her today.


Being a stan for the beefy biracial (check the pen name), I try to look at Mariah with "bless her heart" eyes, even in spite of the foolishness at times. I do wish she'd grow up, though. The song is meh.


It's nice when people openly stan for Mariah. I couldn't get enough of her from her debut up through Butterfly, but I started to pull back a bit after Rainbow. I still buy all her albums though 'cause there's bound to be a couple tracks that I like ("Shake It Off" was my jam).

The new track is pretty cool; it's a hell of a lot better than "It's Like That" as a first single.


It's just so... Mariah. I will agree that if one is all about Mariah, they will love this.

For whatever reason, I just can't get over how offended I am by how dumb she seems. I don't consider myself a dumb-hatah, but on Mariah it totally bugs. She is the anti-Madonna.

Donny B

As a Janet fan, it kills me to know that this safe, mediocre, unoriginal song will be a bigger hit than any single about to be released from Discipline.


Totally amazed at how this piece of shit song warrants so much copy. Sorry. But then I'm not.



Thank you, thank you.

Woke up this morning to the track in my INBOX. And after listening on repeat 5 times, immediately hopped over to your site hoping for some commentary.

As usual, you nail the track and nail Mariah cold. The boobs spilling out, champagne-sippin' on tacky Capri yachts, glitter and diamonds and Body Butter-scented bronzed thighs... nobody delivers gaudy pop-confection with greater scale and consistency then Mimi.

The track is 100% on-brand Mariah. I love it. And love that she has the confidence (and smarts) to step out with a chill, mid-tempo number. Leave all that desperate phraseology to Janet ("Heavy like a first day period", etc. -- but more on Penny Woods in a minute...).

The only thing better will be the Brett Ratner-directed video. Fingers-crossed, we can get something on the level of his best-directed video, and her best video period, "Honey".

As for the comment, "Does she warrant this much copy?" When an artist has delivered as many #1s (did she finally beat the Elvis record yet?) as Mimi, been in the game this long, and still manages to release monster record after monster record -- then it means she's still connecting with the popular culture on a huge level -- and hence more than warrants the occasional wordy post.

And don't compare her to Janet -- at least Mariah is consistent and in control! Look at Janet -- still working the same sad psycho routine year after year. Flailing around hitching herself to whatever producer svengali "daddy" figure is around (first Jam & Lewis, now JD). At least Mariah has the good sense to do that number at the start of her career, get a hefty chunk of Mottola's cash (then Virgin Records'!), and invest in her own sh*t.

Poor Janet -- releasing tired CDs that have 20 trax, 10 of them of her talking (wow, just realizing that Mimi has avoided this trend on ALL her records!). Not to mention of all Janet's horrible body issues, and her desperate stabs at staying in the public eye (Boob Gate, the occasional nasty reference to her vag, flow or some combination thereof).

Mariah is the Steve Jobs of pop music. She understands her brand explicitly and delivers consistently everytime. Even the Glitter soundtrack has some jams!


^^now THAT'S a dedicated stan. :-D i respect that.



I liked her in the beginning, and then I stopped liking her for a while, and then her last album pulled me back in again. I think she is hilarious, really, but I actually like some of her music. This song included.


David and Rich speak to my soul.


I've been waiting to hear your views on the track all day. thank god we both love it. MC will forever be 12. She will never come out with a dance or house track ala feedback she'll just keep putting butterflies on everything and buying Hello Kitty shit. She knows who she is and she doesnt have to impress you.


"Touch My Body," according to Mariah Daily, has had almost 500 radio impressions on all formats. For a new single, that's pretty good. Maybe it will succeed despite what 95% or so of ONTD thinks.

Rich, if the Janet stans are here, just wait until the Madonna ones come!


yeah i had this sent to me last night and was wondering if you'd comment on the single, being as well-known a mariah fan as you are. well i love the song too. still, i hope there are better, bigger songs on the album...
and to answer some of the other commenters, (i'm a madonna fan too but) i think madonna seems a little desperate for radio play in enlisting justin timberlake and timbaland, and pharell, but we'll see what comes of her album too.
and about janet, well i'm lovin the new songs from her. they keep saying its a return to the old janet, but i disagree. the problem with janet is that she was the old janet all along, and thats what everyone was so tired of. she kept re-hashing the same formulas and phrasing that she did in like 1990. enough was enough. but "discipline" seems like its gonna be very good, and hopefully very successful for her.
and a few more things about the new mariah track - does anyone else LOVE the creepy "i will hunt you down" lyric? haha i LIVE FOR IT every time.
and the album being called E=MC2... just cannot be beat. mariah is insane and just too much. how could you NOT love that.


I love Mariah because she is not afraid to just do her. She knows what she is good at and she works it out. After 20 years, she is still making #1 records that people ages 2 (my niece) to 62 (my dad) enjoy. Who else is doing that? Puls, as Sharon Osbourne has said, she has the best tit job in the biz.


Rich, I've been an avid lurker for over a year now, but I had to comment since I lurve lurve love me some Mariah. Always liked her music pre-Butterfly, but HATED the good girl perfect image. I've been totally feeling MC since she became half naked and subsequently got a boob job. lol I like to see manageable flaws in my artists. I need to see the human qualities to my artists - which is probably why I adore Mariah and secretly loathe Beyonce. No robots please!

Anyway, I liked the song from the moment I heard it. It's the epitome of cheesiness and I love it. Mariah refers to You Tube, Wendy Williams, hunting someone down and not minding being filmed while being touched as long as she leaves with the camera. So trite, yet so perfect.

BTW, I love this entry - you've written it so well and describe her super girly ways and adeptly maneuver through her paradoxical image, impact, and artistic influence. She's almost 40 y/o, but prances around as if she were an oversexualized 12 y/o Lolita. It's so ridiculous, but she doesn't give 2 sh%ts. Totally awesome!

I'm loving MC's first single and can't wait for more.

BTW, did you notice that the ending of the song is a bit "subdued" for a Mariah song? Usually the last few bars of her songs are the encore in which she breaks it down and melismas the hell out of note til the last breath and second of the song. She played it a bit cooler at the end of this song or am I overanalyzing things?


Oh, David, where to begin? There's so much, yet I will keep it concise because I have better things to do.

First, your "daddy svengali" comment is just plain weird, considering many artists, including Mariah, have used many different producers, mostly male. Is Mariah producing all her own stuff all by her lonesome? No? So does she have daddy issues, too?

As for Janet's "desperate phraseology," I guarantee you that if a male MC used "I'm heavy like a first day period," no one would blink an eye. At least she takes a chance with an original line (even if some don't like it), something Mariah could never do (not would never do, but could never do).

As far as Janet's "desperate" stabs at staying in the public eye, at least Boob Gate, as you call it, was an accident. How about Mariah stripping on TRL? That was no accident, but it was pretty desperate.

As far as Janet's body issues - yeah, that's a legit thing to make fun of a woman for. How dare Janet not be flawless every waking second? Unlike Mariah, who, you know, spray-paints abs onto herself. No body issues there.

And interesting how Janet's act is "tired" yet Mariah is "consistent." Double-standard, much? Especially considering Mariah has had just as many flops, if not more, than Janet, or do you not remember Mariah's whole Glitter/Charmbracelet/Greatest Hits phase?

But, like I said, her new single will probably be a big hit, so props to her.

To err is to take Mariah Carey seriously. Some of y'all are trippin', to be real.

I was unimpressed upon first listen, but like any subtle Mariah track she snares you with the layered vocals that seem hidden until, oh, I don't know, 20 or so listens (I heard a background vocal in BREAKDOWN that I'd never heard before a month ago.) This is a nice set-up to something big, if L.A., et al, are doing their jobs, and I believe they are - with Mariah, at least.

P.S. Janet. This is not 1992. You can't just drop a single and expect to sell records. Please enrol in the Mariah Carey Non-Stop Promotions School for beginners.


sounds like a cross between shake it off, always be my baby and boy. its ok. since she namechecked youtube in this track haha..its good for a laugh while driving down the freeway. this equals "big hit".


Boob gate was absolutely N0T an accident.


Rich, I love you, but I seriously don't understand how you can like this cunt but detest Madonna. Makes no sense, my friend, no sense at all.


I agree that she's proto-feminine in a Chesty Morgan kind-of-a-way. My Mother, on the other hand, remarked recently that MC carried on like a "ridiculous slut".


She IS a ridiculous slut! And there's no commentary, no irony, no POINT to any of it. It's gratuitous jiggling.

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