The smug get smugger

Not to beat a dead horse pregnant girl, buuuut...

If you like Juno, do yourself a favor and avoid Christine Spines' Entertainment Weekly cover story "Inside Oscar's 100 Million Dollar Baby." If you have any sense, the article will make you hate the film (on the same note, if you already hate it, read up: catharsis is but words away). A big part of the problem is Spines' writing, which is mostly devoted to attempting to convince you of Juno's coolness (as though the movie didn't spend 96 minutes doing that itself!). Did you know, for example, that "the term 'fo' shizz' — an ironic-Ebonics version of 'for sure!'...is becoming a catchphrase"? And we have Juno to thank, instead of that obscure, irrelevant rapper Snoop Dogg who didn't directly help bring gangsta rap to Top 40 radio 15 years ago or anything.

And then there's Spines confusing-at-best method of asserting the character's importance to the medium of film: "Sure, Hollywood has occasionally served up edgy female outcasts, such as Winona Ryder in Heathers or the forlorn geek girls in Ghost World played by Scarlett Johansson and Thora Birch. But those characters were more weirdos than antiheroes. They were marginalized by their difference, whereas Juno is empowered by hers." I'm not even sure what that last sentence means, but I'm positive that to carry weight, it requires explanation. And anyway, aren't Ghost World's Enid and Rebecca empowered by being marginalized? Isn't a major theme in that movie how being an outcast gives you a great vantage point from which to view society? Ghost World is, after all, fundamentally a movie about the great American pastime that is shit-talking. I'm not sure how Heathers' Veronica isn't ultimately empowered either, since she escapes her clique without, you know, dying. In fact, I'd argue that what makes those teen-girl characters so awesome is their struggle with being marginalized and empowered. It's part of the whole process of uncertainty that defines the teenage years of so many people in this country. These characters are girls, not superheroes.

Juno, of course, is a superhero (either that, or she's Punky Brewster in an Empathy Belly...same thing?) and that's by design. The worst things about Spines' article aren't her impositions, but the quotes from those involved in the film. Look, I know Diablo Cody and Ellen Page and Jason Reitman and everyone else involved are experiencing a very exciting time. Juno is, with good reason, so important to them, and only a plastic Empathy Belly fetus could resist buying into his own hype at this point, but come on already. "I saw writing this screenplay as an opportunity to create an iconic female," says Cody, thus dismissing any claims that Juno somehow reflects reality. People aren't icons (unless they're, like, Madonna), and I can't help but read this cynically, as though notoriety was always the point for Cody ("HERE. IS. MY. MARK. ON. FILM."). I know so many people in the world are driven by fame, and while that doesn't made Cody a bad person (although in that dubious quest, badness so often comes as a result), it also doesn't make her this industry-shattering badass that I think a lot of people want her to be. The fact that her blog is mostly devoted to her media appearances is so telling -- she's as much wrapped up in this as her admirers and enablers. Again, it's understandable, but the more I read about and from her (including that Entertainment Weekly column she writes), the more I'm convinced that she's not the real deal, just the Hollywood version of it.

And that makes one of Ellen Page's quotes all the more ridiculous: "Sometimes, when you're playing the quirky girl, she becomes someone's idea of what a quirky girl looks like — a commercialized quirky girl. I'm glad a young, interesting, and different female character [like Juno] is out in the world and doing well at the box office." I'd love for her to explain how Juno is anything but a commercialized quirky girl. Last week, I spent time explaining why I think Juno is a fantasy, and it basically boils down to this: the movie is all answers, no anguish (and made even easier to swallow, thanks to that PG-13 rating). It's a vehicle of quirk and Juno is doing the peddling. I can't really think of any characters who are so dead set on the art of quippage, whose existence depends on their cleverness. For that, I think Juno is the picture of a commercialized quirky girl. Maybe Cody's right: she is an icon, after all.

Comments

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[jasmine]

When I first saw this movie, I ignored all the annoyances because I thought the story was so cute. Then, my sister wanted to see it so, I saw it again. THEN, my friend wanted to see it so, I saw it again. Now I fucking hate it and I'm glad you can actually give my hatred words. I usually just scream "'JUNO' IS PREGNANT ELLEN PAGE AND IRONIC QUIPS!" and storm away from whomever I'm talking to.

[Alex]

this rocks
Rich, you are my idol! I love you!! :)

[smitty]

Joey Potter on Dawson's Creek kinda started that quirky, speaking more sophisticatedly or with wit than a normal teen.

[Jenny]

OMG RICH YOU ALWAYS SAY EVERYTHING THAT EVER NEEDS TO BE SAID EVER AND I'M GLAD YOU CAN SPEAK FOR ME BECAUSE I LOVE YOU AND STUFF.

FINALLY! ANOTHER PERSON WHO HATES THIS MOVIE!!! UGGHGHGHGHGH!!!!!!

[TK]

I love you, Rich, but I loved Juno when I saw it and I still do. I think Diablo set out to make a funny, sweet movie about a girl who gets pregnant and did just that. And while I love Heathers, I despise Ghost World. It is everything I hate about the hipster too cool for school attitude. I wanted Rebecca to slap the shit out of Enid. Actually, I wanted everyone to slap the shit out of Enid.

[April]

I don't know if Ellen Page was actually deflecting the idea that Juno was not a "commercialized quirky girl," especially since the movie is such a fiscal success. She might have meant that since quirky Juno was (maybe) more three-dimensional and cerebral, she's glad the character is so popular now and in turn might set a new standard. Though I doubt that.

[rudy]

I don't think this was so much about disliking the movie as it was decrying the tongue-baths it's gotten since its release.

I, for one, loved the film (twice), but its praise in the media is a bit grating. Since the film has thrust relative newcomers into the limelight and, subsequently, brought their fame-whoring tendencies to the forefront, I admire the collaborative effort more than I do the individual parts that make it a whole (except Ellen Page, whom I thought was pretty great).

In a perfect world, we'd be able to appreciate a film without the outside influence of the media, but that's rarely the case.

Point: I really enjoyed the movie, but agree with the sentiment about its hype.

[melissa]

are you mad because Slut Machine looks just like Diablo Cody?

[Jennifer]

I did read this article before I saw the movie and it did make me hate it. Two things in particular: the implied notion that Ally Sheedy's character in the Breakfast Club is somehow stripped of her outcast credibility once she gets a semi-makeover. She still rips off Emilio's jock badge off his letterman jacket at the end; she is still the same person and her outward appearance didn't define her character. Duh! The second thing was the comment about there not being a female catcher in the rye character in a film. Hello! Natasha Lyonne in Slums of Beverly Hills worked for me just fine.

[njtx71]

i liked juno because for me, the movie was about a lot more than a girl getting knocked up and giving it up for adoption. it is a fantasy in that there's no angst or conflict...everybody just floats along on this cool stream. in real life, the outcome might be the same but it sure as shit wouldn't be this conflict-free and almost zen-like along the way.

that said, juno is better compared to 'ghost world' than to 'heathers'. tk, i'm totally with you on this one about 'ghost world'...nothing is worse than being in a room with nothing but hipsters who are trying to out-hip each other. that, to me, was what watching that film. 'heathers', on the other hand, is meant to be dark, bitter, sardonic and hysterical. 'ghost world' was just meant to be creepy and sad.

[Eric]

People, the entire point of "Ghost World" is that it's as critical of Enid and Seymour as it is with the idiots they critique and pick apart ad nauseum.

Juno, on the other hand, is presented as a best case scenario in every way.

[Miss Lisa]

Heh heh. There are so many people in the film world like this director. She'll fit in just fine. Her blog talks about the best part of being "O-nommed." God help us all.

[Zan]

I loathe Enid in Ghost World. She's one of the most selfish characters I've ever seen committed to film. I sympathized with Rebecca. Rebecca's trying to get her grown woman on and move into her own place and Enid just jets. I kinda cheered when she left. Come back when you grow up.

Juno is not perfect, but I'm so done with the hate for it. I read the EW article and the reporter was terribly square. She writes for a pop culture magazine and had never heard the term fo shizz? Also, can we not use the word ebonics anymore? Actually, I don't think anyone ever uses it. It's such a strange, technical term for something so personal like language.

[Michael in DC]

2 things: one - "Heathers" is one of my favorite movies. two - if I were Juno, I would have gone down on the Jason Bateman character.

[gus]

Really? I thought Jason Bateman's character was creepy and dripping of douchebagginess

[Tanith]

I hope Ellen Page comes out soon.
I feel like "quirky" is a bit of a euphemism, at least among my Sapphic friends. It would be cool to have a 20-something hip gay female celeb. I fear that it would stifle any potential mainstream "leading lady" roles, though. And that sucks.

[jambajim]

thank you for ripping that EW article a new one. when i read the part about ellen page improvising the "fo' shizz" line I thought "Rich is gonna have a field day with this!"

[Carolyn]

All your commentary about this film and its media promotion has been dead on - every article and tv spot has been trying to cram it's 'freshness' down my throat, not saying its a bad film, but all that hype makes the contrary 16 year old in me know that her hamburger phone is now officially uncool...

[Jason]

"Sure, Hollywood has occasionally served up edgy female outcasts, such as Winona Ryder in Heathers or the forlorn geek girls in Ghost World played by Scarlett Johansson and Thora Birch. But those characters were more weirdos than antiheroes. They were marginalized by their difference, whereas Juno is empowered by hers."

This is just completely flabbergasting, especially for a cover story. I effing hate it when EW tries passing off these puff pieces as entertainment journalism. And they wonder why people prefer blogs.

First of all, is Christine Spines confusing Winona's character in "Heathers" with her character in "Beetlejuice"? Veronica and Lydia are not the same person. Veronica isn't a "weirdo outcast," she's one of the most popular girls in school! She just happens to dislike her friends and have a thing for bad boys, and then she accidentally kills her best frienemy.

And excuse me, but she's more "marginalized" than "empowered"? Pardon me? I don't know about the rest of you, but I think that beating Christian Slater nearly to death, lighting your cigarette from his exploding body, and then snatching the scrunchee from Shannon Doherty's perm is a lot more "empowered" than giving your baby to Jennifer Garner and then crying for a while. A snappy quip won't save your high school from blowing up during a pep rally, Ms. MacGuff!

[Liz K]

This movie was cute but it wasnt like the shit or anything. Hollywood needs to give it a rest. But then again, people made a big ass deal about Clueless when it came out...

[chelsea g]

Bless you, Rich.

I've nothing against Juno--it's funny and cute, but you are absolutely correct that it's a happy, shiny, ironically self-referential fantasy, and to pretend anything different is an exercise in happy, shiny, earnest delusion.

[gebba]

Why can't Juno and Heathers both be good? There would be nothing wrong with Diablo Cody giving credit to unique female heroines before her time- instead, she wants to say she is brand new.
As for the faults of Juno, I had so many problems with it, but that didn't mean I didn't love it- I just wish it hadn't been built up to be such an "important" movie.
Also, I was thrown when it turned out the Jason Bateman character wanted Juno... I thought for sure they were making it seem creepy, but really he would end up just seeing how cool it would be to have a daughter to share his interests with.

[Jean]

How I read that Ellen Page comment was that Juno isn't all stylized- like the way that Enid's character was in Ghost World. She was just in jeans and a t-shirt. No short plaid skirts and combat boots. Like when I was in high school in the early 90s, you had to prove you were alternative by looking weird. And you got that style from quirky girl characters in movies. Juno just looked average. And that is actually one thing I found refreshing about the movie. I guess that's how I would interpret the "commercialized" statement.

[superlotado]

April, that's the way I read Ellen Page's quote too. Like, she knows Juno is the commercialized quirky girl, so she's just glad the character is a more realistic version (in her opinion, not mine).