Just in case you need reminding, discourse on transphobia and how sympathy for it manifests itself in Tyra's tranny eye makeup (i.e. ANTM recaps) will go up on Monday. Except maybe not this Monday, because I might have things to say about the VMAs. So, I don't know. Check back on Monday or just wait till Tuesday or don't even bother checking at all. Go on, see if I care.
To tide you over, some ANTM-related videos. The first is the reappearance of my Spazzy Tyra montage that I made compiling this woman's insanity during the Cycle 7 premiere. This has been off YouTube for a long time -- probably since two accounts ago, and sometimes people ask for it (even though I'd do a much better job editing it these days) so whatever. Here it is. The second is a mash-up of ANTM and Full House. It's weird enough to start with, but it really gets good in the last half. I heart Stephanie more than Tiffany's grandmother likes spending her electric-bill money on bikinis. Finally, and I think best of all, there is a "poop" version (for the unaware, YouTube poop amounts basically to demented video reedits of existing crap on YouTube) of Tyra's Final 14 ceremony from last year's premiere. It'll fuck you up.
See you Monday. Or Tuesday. Or NEVER!
I can't wait what you say about Tyrabot.
beam us up fiercely?
Posted by: Ledh | September 04, 2008 at 11:01 AM
Ha! Last night I was just thinking about when the new recap would be up. I was also marveling at all the blood, sweat and tears you put into to this and how complainers can just SUCK IT!
Can't wait for Tuesday!
Posted by: mariaaaaa | September 04, 2008 at 11:07 AM
you are so awesome!
Posted by: erin | September 04, 2008 at 11:10 AM
I imagine that last clip is what people in The Ring suffered through before kicking the bucket seven days later.
Posted by: Rudy | September 04, 2008 at 11:16 AM
I had an asthma attack I laughed so hard at that last one.
"For real?"
"No."
Posted by: Steven | September 04, 2008 at 11:19 AM
And here I was wondering if you were even going to write a recap. What do you do with that material. Is there really any way to make it funnier (I trust you Rich but it seems like a chore)! But seriously, where do you go with that? I spent the entire 1st hour of last night laughing hysterically, which is what your blog is supposed to make me do, not the show itself! I don't know if I can hold on through Cycle 11. SPOILER ALERT i was ready to commit tyracide when she said plus size chick was to skinny and made her wear a f***ing towel under her shirt.....seriously...
Posted by: Angela | September 04, 2008 at 11:32 AM
That episode was amazing and horrifying all at once! I loved it and all I could think about was I can't wait until next week when Rich recaps it.
I know it's a lot of work, but you seriously make my day, my week with that hilarity! I have all my friends anxiously awaiting your recaps too!
Posted by: Sara | September 04, 2008 at 12:12 PM
I think that I might have had an epileptic seizure...and I don't have epilepsy.
Cant wait for the recap.
Sorry gotta run...beaming up fiercely!
Posted by: Wanda | September 04, 2008 at 12:19 PM
that first video had me CACKLING!
i love the fact that there were so many of us watching last night that had your recaps on their mind! i absolutely did! CAN. NOT. WAIT!
looking forward to the vma wrapup too!
have a great weekend & thank you for all of your hard work amusing us!
Posted by: meg | September 04, 2008 at 12:44 PM
NO! Not "never!" Please, not NEVER!!
It's telling that I haven't even seen the first episode, but I felt compelled to see if you'd written anything yet. :o)
Posted by: Becky | September 04, 2008 at 12:52 PM
Can't wait! I will be F5-ing like a madwoman. It was so over-the-top theme-wise, I almost couldn't hang. The whole time, I was thinking about what you would say. "'Beam me up fiercely'? Oooooh, I hope Rich has a megamix!"
Posted by: laylaness | September 04, 2008 at 01:43 PM
please dont say never rich, please!!!
i cant wait, but take your time hun!
Posted by: Faith | September 04, 2008 at 02:16 PM
last night's episode was practically MADE for you to recap! I was dying watching it.
"I'm FROM ALASKA! We Don't Even Have BLOGS!"
Posted by: abby | September 04, 2008 at 02:23 PM
Those videos. So insane, yet meaningful within their context... I need a tonic now. Thank you. As always, I need to see more neck.
Posted by: Miss Lisa | September 04, 2008 at 02:25 PM
echoes of david lynch in that last one? i do think so. ^_^
Posted by: | September 04, 2008 at 03:24 PM
like aphex twin and antm had a 3 headed baby
Posted by: yamomsyo | September 04, 2008 at 03:28 PM
Tyra-bot, Alpha Jay, and Beta Jay. That's all I have to say.
I still miss Natasha. "I'm seein' Jays, and I'm skreamin'..."
Posted by: Colleen | September 04, 2008 at 03:36 PM
Colleen, same here. I ALWAYS say "I can't believe I'm seeing them alive!" whenever they first appear.
Posted by: ames | September 04, 2008 at 03:57 PM
I ran out of crackers there was so much cheese last night. Monday (!) can't come sooner.
Elina is my Katarzyna for this cycle so she has my vote and Analeigh/Michelle Trachtenberg.
Posted by: BartenderJay | September 04, 2008 at 04:20 PM
I don't know if anybody noticed last night, but I thought it was hilarious when Tyra said "Alpha Bay, Beta Jay" followed by her completely nonsensical pressing of the buttons on the console.
Posted by: Alex | September 04, 2008 at 04:39 PM
these video's made my day
Posted by: Mikey | September 04, 2008 at 05:10 PM
Why no Whitney and Ty-Ty photo in the house this season?
And WTF with Mr/Beta Jay's wig?!
Posted by: BartenderJay | September 04, 2008 at 05:40 PM
http://jezebel.com/assets/images/jezebel/2008/09/antm11g.jpg
=
http://a772.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/60/l_4b354b730cc6b7f804731aade36a66c3.jpg
Posted by: raymi | September 04, 2008 at 06:36 PM
hahaha!!
Posted by: Donna | September 04, 2008 at 07:05 PM
I was only ten minutes into the premiere when I thought to myself "This is going to give Rich material for YEARS."
Posted by: Henry Evil | September 04, 2008 at 07:30 PM