The greatest feat of Britney Spears' umpteenth "comeback single" is its title. "Womanizer" isn't a particularly nice-sounding word and at four syllables, it runs the risk of overstaying the average pop listener's attention span. I say bravo to a song that creates a chant out of a term that has barely any linguistic relevance in 2008 (at least to me -- the word conjures up images in my head of gold chains against chest hair, specifically that of Larry on Three's Company).
But my accolades stop there, because a title does not make a song. This thing stinks worse than Cheeto dust and is just as tenacious. "Womanizer, woman-womanizer, you're a womanizer / Oh, womanizer, oh, you're a womanizer, baby / You, you you are, you you you are / Womanizer womanizer womanizer womanizer." There isn't a wet wipe strong enough to scrub my brain of those four syllables that see-saw between a scant two notes. It's in my head indefinitely, and though my fingers are spared, I fear that my soul is turning neon orange.
I loved Blackout for its adherence to its title -- it cheerfully kept moving in a decontextualized frenzy, as if Brit were so fucked up that she couldn't possibly reference the disaster her life had become. Though "Womanizer" comes from a seemingly Stepfordized Brit, it's a quiet mess that doesn't even require her to pretend she's carrying a tune. She just kind of hum-mumbles (humbles?) the verses until she gets to that two-note chorus, which requires just slightly more humming. The most work she puts in is to block off her nasal passages, so as to sound like she has a cold. But sniffles are no substitute for singing, and she's just getting her faux-germs on the mouthpiece as she phones this shit in. Her glaring lack of effort is on par with her VMAs performance last year, but it's missing the thrill of watching her dismantle her career live.
Not that I'd ever expect a virtuoso performance from her. The biggest letdown is the track itself, which uses feedback-y synths to remind us that guitars are edgy (which is as stupid as winning MTV Video Music Awards to remind us that you're still relevant) and a punishing 4/4 beat that tops out at 139 BPM and sounds passe enough to conjure Rihanna's 2006 hit "S.O.S." Here, melody is much less important than how rapidly it's intoned, and as a track that's excessively fast and incessant until it isn't, "Womanizer" is musical FiOS. Perhaps as a commodity, that's ideal, but it's also nothing to be proud of.
Thank goodness... a ray of informed musical critique in a world of mindless pandering.
I read Pink is the new Blog and he preens over Britney's every move. UGH.
Posted by: Chris | October 08, 2008 at 11:44 PM
The Teenagers remix of Womanizer is soo much better.
But the chorus still sucks.
Posted by: Sam | October 09, 2008 at 02:02 AM
Just for you:
http://server3.uploadit.org/files/djDannyShaffer-Larry.jpg
Posted by: chiko chevere | October 09, 2008 at 02:48 AM
So many Christina haters. LOL. Must be Britney fans hijacking this post. Honestly, I also LOVED Blackout. Never thought I would coz the only Britney song I ever tolerated ever was Slave4U and thats because it sounded like Britney doing Prince (its obvious isn't it) but Blackout was trashy but delicious! A Girls Gone Wild record by Britney's standard I guess. With that I was kind of looking forward to hear how she's going to top that.
Totally not expecting "Meh".
Ive to say Womanizer is boring. Its flat. Tedious. Half baked. Not even punchy or angry or whatever. Everything on Blackout was far superior than this record.
That said, I did look on Youtube for fanmade mashups (I love shit like that) and found this. Much much better.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AkqSOCh3qm8
Posted by: Fendie | October 09, 2008 at 03:01 AM
Oh and you know what's shocking.
Chris "Leave Britney Alone" Crocker had a track out too and u have to listen to that.
Haha. I wont say why. But compare.
Posted by: Fendie | October 09, 2008 at 03:03 AM
While the song is nothing spectacular, it definitely has grown on me over the past few weeks.
Is that a "Strangers With Candy" reference in the title? Or does Jerri say, "Boozer and a loser" in the credits? Either way, thanks for the wonderful blog, as always.
Posted by: M | October 09, 2008 at 08:27 AM
Thank you, Rich! It's about time we heard an intelligent perspective on this song. I've gotten sick and tired of everyone saying it's her "comeback" single and the old Britney is back. The song is repetitive, boring and not that great. Frankly, there were much better songs on Blackout and that's saying something. I'm glad her personal life isn't a HUGE mess anymore, but I need to hear something more than this DOA single to prove she's still relevant.
Posted by: sonny | October 09, 2008 at 09:41 AM
anyone else feel like the track might have been a reject from blackout? or even radar, possibly. I just can't see britney putting in even the minimal amount of effort it would take for her to record this song if she didn't have to. and also, I just can't see such a musically irrelevant song being being created for britney at this time.
Posted by: mitchell | October 09, 2008 at 11:14 AM
The chorus is annoying...and the song sounds like an ode (as does Christina's latest) to Rachel Steven über fabulous 2005 release!
Posted by: bazooka joe | October 09, 2008 at 11:45 AM
Isn't Lady GaGa already the poor man's Lady GaGa?
Posted by: JH | October 09, 2008 at 12:00 PM
'while I sit back, cross my arms and mumble "meh."'
Ooh, how jaded rock critic of you.
It's a solid pop song. Not Britney's best, but I really think the main reason that people criticize it so much is because of how hyped it is. In contrast Gimme More quietly leaked onto the internet, got very little airplay and almost zero promotion. For Womanizer people are stepping over their own grandmother to see one new screencap of the new music video.
As a die-hard cheeto-cheezy pop fan, I like it. I do have to admit it sounds like a mix between Blackout tracks Ooh Ooh Baby and Radar, but dammit, I think Blackout 2.0 should get a second chance.
And for everyone that is too cool to listen to cheesy pop music- you're really boring.
Posted by: kiki | October 09, 2008 at 07:25 PM
You really have no taste in music at all. It's a SOLID, solid pop song. It doesn't have an extreme hook, but it still carries a beat that is a throwback to In The Zone. I'm sorry that you prefer overproduced trance beats that are lacking significance.
Posted by: Ouch | October 09, 2008 at 07:39 PM
Womanizer is the new 'Me Against the Music'
It's not particularly great, but it's the carpet that will be used for as the entrance for the TRUE Album single that'll be her 2nd release. (Like Toxic)
Posted by: Stephanieee! | October 09, 2008 at 07:43 PM
I was hoping that Spears would produce some slightly more innovative music after her post depressive-nervous breakdown but sadly, that doesn't seem to be the case.
Evan
www.beyondrace.com
Posted by: Evan | October 10, 2008 at 10:56 AM
Maybe it's just me, but I prefer Britney when she's not trying to be a singer and just putting out music I can dance like I crazy woman to in a club.
So... I like this song. Especially because I don't have to listen to her "sing" and instead can just listen to her... WOMANIZERWOMANIZERWOMANIZERWOMANIZER...
Posted by: S | October 11, 2008 at 09:53 AM
I sort of love it because it is so awful. I can only listen to BritBrit if the song is reasonably bad. It's no Piece of Me though.
Posted by: Sally | October 11, 2008 at 10:49 AM
It's eating what little brain cells I had left and I cannot get the freakin' chorus out of my head.
Oh please, let it stop or I shall be forced to sing "rubber ducky" to purge myself.
Posted by: Michelle | October 12, 2008 at 02:24 AM
When I first heard this song I thought it was pretty average, but it's definitely grown on me. And like someone else just said, her first single from each album isn't always the best. There could be some quality stuff coming up.
Also, not sure what is so confusing for everyone about people calling it her "comeback" -- doesn't mean it's amazing quality (an artist's "comeback" has never necessarily indicated that), just means that she might actually be coherent enough to promote this single and the forthcoming album.
Posted by: Zander | October 12, 2008 at 06:21 PM
oh shut up hater, you are always dogging on her. just get over the fact that tori amos and bjork will never win a mainstream award, jealous queen.
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