Hail to the chimp

Someone with the cinematic means needs to take their camera and point it on Cheeta, the oldest living non-human primate (76!) and star of many a Tarzan flick, and his current handler/companion Dan Westfall right now because the resulting documentary would obviously be fucking amazing. In Entertainment Weekly's awesome Cheeta profile, "It's Hard Out There for a Chimp," Westfall delivers quote after full-of-win quote:

• "When we're alone, just doing stuff around the house or going for a drive, it's a very — how should I say it without sounding stupid? — it's almost a spiritual thing, the love we have for each other. The way he looks at me sometimes — I can't explain it. He's my best friend.''

• ''[In Cheeta's upcoming "autobiography"], they talk about him masturbating, cussing, jumping the fence and having sex with another chimp. Not that I'm a prude, but...''

And in my favorite turn, Westfall bitches about Cheeta's lack of a Walk of Fame star:

• ''It's politics. Lassie is on there. Rin Tin Tin is on there. This year they gave it to Tinker Bell — she's not even a living, breathing creature! It's ridiculous.''

I need to see this play out on some sort of a screen right now. If cat people are crazy, I get the feeling that that monkey people are, like, feces-throwing insane.

Comments

[little_lj]

I knew someone at college who grew up with monkeys, because his dad ran some kind of monkeys-only zoo. He was a little odd. I think he's a crystal-meth addict now..

[Janelle]

first!!!

and "I get the feeling that that monkey people are, like, feces-throwing insane." is pretty hilarious!

[PurpleMonk]

There's a 3 min video of Cheeta talking and displaying some of his own paintings over at

http://www.wholphindvd.com/issues/wholphin-no-4/

just scroll down to the video entitled "Cheeta" and download.

Your welcome.

[HouseofJules]

The Spongebob party hat seemed a little over-the-top, and then I reminded myself that it's a birthday party for "the oldest living non-human primate", and damnit if he wants a spongebob party hat, let him have it!
Jules
House of Jules

[m]

what is the current banner from? ..anybody?

[Sparker]

Yes they are insane. Insane enough to remind you that chimpanzees are not, in fact, monkeys but apes ; )

However I'm still holding out for a house full of cats because they can cause enough damage allll on their own. I don't even want to know what an angry chimp could do to a house.

Happy Birthday Cheeta!

[MB]

Here is some freaky monkey people stuff, if you haven't seen it already: http://abcnews.go.com/Primetime/Story?id=5276256&page=1

It's a Primetime segment on people who adopt "monkids" and treat Capuchin monkeys like babies.

[DLCS]

Tinkerbell has a star on the Walk Of Fame?
Damn. I think I need to go back to bed after that one.

I want to take Dan Westfall out for brunch for the "he's my best friend" line. That kicks so much sad ass.

[Annegret]

M: The banner is from "Halloween 3", I believe.

[Sarah]

Oh my god, if you want confirmation that "monkey people" are crazy you need to watch the Humanzee documentary. I've been obsessed with it for years. I think you might enjoy it...here's part one and the rest is on youtube. Get excited for the guy who is a pianist and completely obviously obsessed in a weird way.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-C6NkRUbI38

[spazmo]

Is this the same chimp that co-starred in the Johnny Weismuller Tarzan flicks?

I only ask because in an old Tonight Show interview, Maureen O'Sullivan (Jane), claimed that Cheeta was gay. The audience laughed, because the idea of gay animals back then was absurd, but she swore up and down that Cheeta would get very aggressive toward her when she did romantic scenes with Tarzan.

[Annegret]

Spazmo: Well, he IS wearing a Spongebob hat. Just sayin'. ;o)

best quote of the article: He will soon record a cover of the 1975 novelty tune ''Convoy'' — not so much singing as hooting along with the song.

[Cheryl]

"That's what you get for not Hailing to the Chimp!" (hopefully I didn't misquote Simpsons too badly there)

[Noel]

Did you check the extra footage on their site?
Cheeta
The video is proof that your theory is true, fucking amazing.

[Matthew]

@m: I think the banner is from Halloween III - Season of the Witch.

I read this article when my EW came in the mail last week. Very interesting. I will be wating with bated breath for his single to be released.

[Sunbunny]

That chimp can drink soda out of a can?! Fuck, I can't even do that gracefully without the aid of a coozy.

[guy pretending to be Cheeta]

I'm an ape Rich, not a monkey. How would you like me to call you the f-word?

[mariaaaaa]

Having a chimp around the house would scare me because of their strength, but for the love of God I want a helper monkey so bad. I pray to God that I one day may have my own Mojo.

[DG]

I've been freaked out by monkey people ever since the kids at school were into Monchichi dolls. Remember them? You'll find them here if you want to have some sleepless nights:

http://www.atamaii.com/monchichi-basic.html

Scaryboo.

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jumping the fence and having sex with another chimp. Not that I'm a prude, but...''