One night a few weeks ago, I hailed a cab to take me home to Brooklyn. All went well for a few minutes, with nary a peep from my driver, until he rear-ended the cab in front of us on Bowery and Houston. I wasn't too bothered, since I was kind of drunk and no major damage was done to me or the car (not that I cared about the car -- I'm just saying this tap was so insignificant, it wasn't even fender-bender level). He, however, was extremely bothered -- his blunder was the catalyst he needed to explode into a story about getting picked up by the police and being held at the hospital for five hours (do they really hold you at the hospital for five hours, or was "hospital" a euphemism for "jail?") earlier that evening. He claimed racism, but from my angle, the police were not only doing their job, they were doing god's work.
From what I could tell, Mohammed wasn't drunk (i.e. I didn't smell anything on his breath), but something was profoundly up. He said something that was a perfect mesh of weirdness and exasperation. I can't remember it now, because as I was grabbing my phone to note it, I realized that I should go one better and record this display of on-the-job-off-his-rocker-ness with my camera (for the primary purpose of gathering the audio). Mohammed ranted at me for 20 minutes, taking about twice as long to drop me off as he should have -- you'll see why via navigational mishaps in the video below. I enjoyed every second of Mr. Mo's wild ride, which I've edited down to five minutes:
(Note: Understand that I weighed the pros and cons of posting this and I've considered all angles of criticism. In the end, I feel OK putting it out there because I believe in consuming entertainment where you find it and, uh, I kinda risked my life for the footage. I earned it! Mo's story must be told!)
I got a cab home from work once, because I was cut around around 1.30 in the morning and didn't feel like taking public transportation. The driver proceeded to ask me out for dinner, drive me by his house and offer to stop in so he could get me a present he had for me, drive by the place he would take me out for dinner were I to accept, tell me his friend could give me a free gift card for the gas station if I accepted, and quiz me on my appreciation for and knowledge of India.
A few weeks later my coworker also got a cab from work late at night, got the same driver, and he quizzed her all about me. I never got a cab from work again.
Posted by: C | October 06, 2008 at 01:05 AM
Can someone please find the name of his clothing store? Also, what was that part about rooting through a garbage can?
Posted by: Bobbie | October 06, 2008 at 03:06 AM
Moving this video to Irishman's personal queue. It failed to receive enough votes to get sifted up to the front page within 2 days.
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williamgeorge
Search Engine Optimization
Posted by: williamgeorge | October 06, 2008 at 05:41 AM
Oh god you scared me Rich, I thought you had fucking Blue Man Group as your banner LOL. Can anyone/Rich tell me what the banner actually is? Thanks
Posted by: matt | October 06, 2008 at 10:25 AM
@matt - The banner is Nas in the film BELLY.
Rich, you are a brave soul for sticking it out for the whole ride!
Posted by: John R | October 06, 2008 at 12:47 PM
I love all the crazy Tori Amos fans losing their shit over the post title.
I'm glad you recorded the ride & shared it. I would never have the presence of mind to record things like this, & it's the kind of thing that people won't get from just telling them about it.
Posted by: Katie B | October 06, 2008 at 06:00 PM
Off the mothafucking chain, Rich! You are brave - I would have gotten out while he was driving up the wrong way.. lol but, not unheard of in ny
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Posted by: Njmfbusa | July 15, 2009 at 02:12 AM
If you have to do it, you might as well do it right.
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Thank you scanner. It is too bad the media isn't getting it right. But that is probably not just circumstance.
Posted by: standby killer | November 15, 2011 at 01:19 AM
This is so very inspirational and educational. And I just smiled when I saw the photo of you with your book at the end of this marvelous piece! Thank you for sharing this!!! And many congratulations to you! Rated with admiration.
Posted by: children tricycles | November 15, 2011 at 01:21 AM
Wonderfully inspirational and so well told. Thank you for the advice. -R-
Posted by: tricycle baby | November 15, 2011 at 01:23 AM