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September 28, 2009





first? Loved it, as usual. I find my love for Laura growing by the day. And Erin, for some reason, reminds me of Hermione Granger sometimes. Am I the only one?

Vanessa M

So, I dunno. Kinda boring cycle right? I do feel that somewhere Laura is naked, eating cereal and laughing her ass off at the jpg of her imprisoned in the frozen foods next to Bubba Burgers.

I was curious why Tanisha didn't have MLACG spots after several episodes (because I have have a freakish level of curiosity about the world) and according the Live Journal ANTM group she is too busy modeling in South Africa? Which doesn't make much sense to me. Does that mean she didn't get the money? It's like some really petty personal wish fulfillment as she supplanted Saleisha as my least. favorite. winner. in.the. HIStory. of. Top. Model.

Also, if all you have to say is "First" you truly have nothing to say.


Amazing and hilarious as always. Thank you so much for making my Monday afternoon of studying for the GRE a little less boring.


Great recap as always but you really think they're gonna let Erin have this? Don't see it at all. Perhaps Britany. Personally routing for Bloody Eyeball - lost cause, I know - but her pictures are so far the best.


Is it just me, or does Kara's nose look photoshopped in her "best photo"?


erin sometimes reminds me of the chick from "my girl" though less now that she has the coloring of an albino.


The fact they had to bring in a 9 year old to teach walking just shows how pathetic this show really is.

Also, Bianca(?) doesn't look like she's scowling, she looks like she's taking a huge dump in the hot tub.

Golden J

"Yeah, well I too am naked eating cereal right now, and I'm typing with my penis."

Rich...you're too hot to be making jokes like this. It teases me too much. In fact, I couldn't even really pay attention to the rest of the recap because I was just imagining you naked and slapping things with your penis.

In other news, I love Rae.


Love you, as always. I wish you'd mentioned 'Top Model in Action' McKey whose notable accomplishments include getting dropped by Elite NY and shipped off to Chicago, and serving out her ANTM prizes. Yeah, badass career.

Anyway, gorgeous recap. Your bloody eyeball photo explanation thing made me laugh out loud, and I agree 100% with the categorization of Fun bitch/Bitchy bitch/Sad Bitch/HBIC. Wish Ashley's stankosity had left us first.



OMG...I love Laura! She always brings hillbilly joy to my heart! I also love Diva. America's Next Top Child Model!

And I was going to ask you about the My Life as a Covergirl (or lack there of). At least they brought back Models in Action, so we can hear all about the magazine covers we never knew existed and all the Wal-mart appearances.

Easy. Breezy. Mediocre. CoverGirl.


Did anyone else notice how at the end of the episode when they showed all of Lulu's photos back to back they photoshopped her mole out of some but not others??


I don't know why, but the scroll part made me laugh the hardest.


Is it just me or is Laura modelling herself after Mary Cherry??


I actually think that McKey looks pretty good in some of her pics - you know the few where she is not sticking to Tyra's advice of looking like her BF punched her?


Typing with your penis is a visual I definitely needed. Also, totally feel that Laura is a sweet version of Mary Cherry from Popular with a mix of B-Ho.


"They're shorter than first-time sex."

Rich, you're the man & don't let anyone tell you differently. Mad love.


"Cannot wait till he invents 'shizzle!'"

-I lost it at this one. So funny. Thank you for making a really crappy Monday SO much better. You, sir, are America's Next Top Awesome.

Teyona is so forgettable that I literally had to look up who won last cycle even though I watched it. I couldn't remember her at all. And "smize" is the final straw. Tyra will burn in hell for that. It makes me homicidal to hear it.

Also- Diva? The BEST "guest" they've ever had. Loved her shaming all the shorties.


2 least Lulu can get a job as Jody Watley's mini me


Vanessa M

Oops, her name is "Teyonna" not "Tanisha." So memorable I've forgotten her.

I think Tanisha was the winner of Scream Queens and she was kind of awesome in fact.


I knew that Lulu was going to end this episode with bags packed when she pulled out the chestnut about having a signature walk. Any girl who says more than once that she knows better than Miss J is so out the door it's ridiculous.


Hey Rich,

Long time reader, first time commenter. I've only been able to catch this season so far on YouTube. With this past episode in particular, my browser was being dramatic. Lucky me, it led to this capture, which I thought you'd enjoy.



I love Laura. Natasha still has a place in my heart though. That was a good cycle.

Awesome recap, though I didn't watch this episode.


OK, so it has to be said that the 9 year old model is the creepiest thing I've ever seen on this show. A fucking NINE year old girl shouldn't be doing this shit. She should be playing with her friends and being a kid, not already being thrust into the modeling world. It's disgusting.

Anyway, Kara's picture was NOT the best. Bloody Eyeball's made her look tallest which was the point. But I did like how Kara wrapped the rope around her leg. That was a nice touch.

I'm really enjoying Laura so far, but this cycle is kind of blah, despite the ridiculous crap that's already happened (ie Smize, which is just pathetic in every way).

And Rich, I totally agree with you on The Reader. I didn't actually cry, but it kind of broke my heart a little bit and it made the story so much more interesting rather than the simple black-and-white I was expecting from a story about a Nazi prison guard.


Great recap, as usual.

Actually, I don't think this cycle is that bad (as long as you ignore "smize", of course). The only person left I really don't like (personality- and look-wise) is Ashley, and if we have a Nicole/Erin/Laura final 3, I'll be completely happy. Of course, that isn't going to happen, since now is the cycle of the token Asian winner (which should have been April back in cycle 2, in my opinion). I simply don't get Jennifer. Honestly, there have to be more gorgeous Asian girls under 5'7 in America than just one...

Oh, and I fear for Rae - I think she's getting the "great at the start and then constantly slipping"-edit, which means she won't last much longer.

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