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May 27, 2010


Vanessa M

A few years ago I had jury duty and was seated on a case where a guy was suing his doctor for fucking up a routine arm surgery. The way he broke his arm: arm wrestling at his job with some dude who was 100 pounds heavier. I told the guys at work about it as a safety warning cause I had no idea that shit could really happen and they were like "Well, duh. Didn't you see Over the Top?" Well, no.

Not so funny the jury thing though. He lost almost all use of his right arm.

I don't want to end on a depressing note. You should watch Rhinestone so we can see a future installment of this post. Sly sings and does stand-up. And Dolly is in it and I can forgive almost anything that involves her.


I've never seen "Over the Top" (although I will now), so my only prior reference for it was the SNL hosted by Sylvester Stallone in 1997. There's a sketch where Stallone plays himself, and he's trying to comfort a man (Norm MacDonald) who's been in a terrible car accident. But MacDonald just keeps talking shit on Stallone's movies, saving the biggest rant for "Over the Top." I can't find video for it, but here's a transcript:



Oh man... thanks for this. I'm pretty sure my brother and I spent about 87% of our childhood doing TopGun hi-fives, Over the Top arm wrestling, and WWF figure-fours.


I admit to seeing every single Stallone movie ever made. I am not ashamed of this fact; I just can't help myself. (I will be dragging my old man to see The Expendables when it hits theatres.) I've always thought he was attractive in a weird He-Man/Bassett hound amalgam and I have never been disappointed in a Stallone movie (okay, Stop! Or Mt Mom Will Shoot was pretty damned terrible, but still, Estelle Getty!). Granted I usually laugh when I'm not "supposed" to, but I have to give it up for a man who has brought so much delicious cheese to my life. Count me in as a fellow fan of Over the Top...for many of the same reasons you appreciate it...plus arm wrestling! I love pretty much any sports movie ever made, and I don't really like many sports, but like Stallone, I can't help myself...they are always the cheesiest, most predictable things ever. When they make a movie about curling, I am so there.


I always loved over the top as a kid, even as a prepubescent boy I knew there was something extremely interesting about overly muscled sweaty trashy guys holding hands with each other.

Rhinestone is pretty dreadful, but Dolly is in it, and if you're a fan, you already know you're willing to sit through anything to see her. If you're not, then this might be torture. Especially since its so country music heavy.

Kristen S

This movie is AMAZING!!! But oh, that kid. That kid. Most obnoxious child actor ever. It's the worst in the beginning when he's all sassy and emote-y and keeps saying things like "Permission to cry, siirrrrr." What is the word I am looking for? Yeasty? That kid is yeasty.

Rich, if you haven't seen The Company of Wolves yet, you just have to. I watched it for the first time last night, and it is actually the *craziest* movie I've ever seen. It's like a weirdly high budget fusion of Troll 2 and Valerie and her Week of Wonders and Teen Wolf and oh god, I just don't know. It's just wild ass stories that don't make sense within wild ass stories that don't make sense, punctuated by WTF eroticism and gratuitous, outlandish special effects fuckery. Like, apropos of nothing, this happens:


It's a mind blower, and it will lead you down a truly hilarious wikipedia rabbit hole.

Liz Grammaticas

Lincoln Hawk is the name of the Rufus Humphrey's band on Gossip Girl. In Gossip Girl, they were ranked as one of the 'top ten forgotten bands of the 90s' by Rolling Stone. So, 20 years later, I think the CW & writers of Gossip Girl have finally cleared up the Hawk(s) confusion. Clearly, the preference is for Hawk.

Here is a link:


Love this movie, hated the kid even back in the day.

Thanks for bringing back good (bad?) memories!

Tashina S.

I also recommend Rhinestone with Dolly Parton and Stallone. I especially am hoping someday to see a band cover my favorite song from the movie,"Drinkenstein".


Did you know that Sylvester Stallone is technically an artist? Technically. Because his technique suuuuuuuuuucks. But some of his shit was featured at Art Basel Miami, and apparently two of them sold for about $60,000 each. I don't even know...


When I was a teenager I had a romantic dream about Sylvester Stallone. (not sexual!) I always just thought he was hot. So the first part of 'Absurdity' was just what the doctor ordered.


Black Eyed Peas sing Meet Me Halfway, not Kenny Loggins. I can see how you'd get Kenny and Fergie's voices confused, but no.


If this is a regular feature, please do the next one on Ben and Arthur!


It's like a gay The Room, but IMO even funnier -Arthur's stripclub audition is begging to be gif'd...


Rich -

I'm having such a shit day, and just skimming through this post made me laugh through the blind rage.



Can you make a Netflix catagory? I want to see everything you have ever posted about.


I maintain that Commando still tops the list for best homoerotic 80s action movie ever, but Over the Top gets credit for having the kid's name be, basically, Mike Hawk. Say it out loud. I know, he took his mom's last name or something, but we all know he changed it Hawk once his pop won.


I'll throw in a vote for a compare/contrast between "The Room" and "Ben and Arthur" simply because I want to hear/read Rich's take on "You are tearing me apart, Lisa!"


"I'm your boyfriend now." CLASSIC. Can that dude be my boyfriend too, please?

that's MRS. Nigel Barker to you

I had the pleasure of watching this movie with the RiffTrax treatment and it was more than a little alright :)


we need to see the "Mike" cut, too.


Rich, it is imperative that you find the novelization of this movie. The end describes what Hawk(s) is thinking of during the last scene. He has a lot of fantasies of what he will be doing with his son, including riding horses on the beach.



Ha, I love this. I've never seen Over the Top (I grew up in a houseful of girls), but it was apparently an important part of my husband's childhood, so he's talked about the movie and demonstrated the titular move.


I'm re-watching the first season of "The O.C." and they just referenced this movie. Thanks to you I finally understand the reference.


Holy shit, I thought I must have made up this movie in my mind when I was high - but here it is, and it's real.

Not the first time you've posted something I assumed was a drug-induced daydream Rich, and not the last I hope.


That kid was on General Hospital @ the time this movie came out. And brought down every scene he was in, with THE WORST saccharin acting possible

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