[REC]²: Exponentially stupider than the first

The Spanish-language horror film [REC]² is now available to watch On Demand and via Amazon. You should get it if you like pretentious nonsense. I really didn't like the first one, and I liked this one far less. I explain why with spoilers below.

[REC]², Jaume Balagueró and Paco Plaza’s follow-up to 2007’s [REC], plays like an exposé on the limitations of POV horror. The hand- and head-held cameras (the latter are affixed to the helmets of a SWAT team) shake and capture action too close or too far for us to be able to discern what’s really going on in the apartment building full of screaming zombies that we're trying to focus on. The cameras also tend to conk out at the least convenient times. Because the film is crafted to feel as though it was shot in first person (albeit with a shifting point of view, so maybe I should say “shot in the first persons”), there’s little here to do the job of establishing shots. The viewer frequently is unaware of exactly who’s holding the camera. Or what’s happening to whom, for that matter.

But real life is sloppy, thus vérité fiction should be, too. Nobody’s promised anything in life, much less an establishing shot. The main problem with [REC]² (besides the unnecessary superscript in its title, of course) is that it’s too quick to embrace the inherent sloppiness of the hand-held format, but otherwise unwilling to conform to the logic of reality. The action shifts from whichever camera is directing the action to the SWAT team members’ helmet cameras seamlessly (usually it goes from main camera to picture-in-picture with a small box showing the helmet cam and then the helmet cam expands to take up the screen). I am not sure what we are watching, then, per the film’s own reality. Certainly, it isn’t found raw footage. Is it supposed to be raw footage that has been pieced together by some picture-in-picture-happy editor? And if so, then why does a battery meter sometimes show up? What about the red record symbol? Why is there an on-screen display informing me that we are in still mode? That kind of information would not show up burned onto actual footage's picture -- you'd only see it in the viewfinder. Am I looking at the viewfinder? Am I holding the camera? But what about when the other guy who just died was holding the camera? Was I him? Am I dead? Did you kill me, [REC]²? Answer me, I'm not as dead as you think I am! Via its medium, this movie attempts to portray a gritty, realer experience, but it simply can’t handle the truth. I wouldn't begrudge a stupid horror move its stupidity, but this movie set itself up for failure.

(On a note related to [REC]²'s misunderstanding of its own medium: Equally irritating is that we have a sense of the camera powering down via some on-screen static and noise cues, when in actuality, a camera turning on and off would result in nothing more than a jump cut in playback. Even worse, a lot of time after it’s signaled that the camera has cut out, it slowly comes back with first sound [!] then the beep signaling the camera has been turned back on [!!] and then the picture slowly fading in [!!!]. Why do I feel like I understand how cameras work better than people whose livelihoods depend on them?)

I wouldn’t forgive this subgenre sacrilege even if the film spoke to me directly and said, “Here you go, Rich: We’ve resurrected Russ Meyer so that he can direct Mariah Carey in a proper biopic that features a score of recently never-heard-before vintage Italo disco -- the good kind.” It, however, does not say that. What it actually says is that the zombies of the first film are, in fact, not zombies at all, but demons resulting from a tenant priest’s attempt to isolate “the chemical essence of demonic possession." Seriously, "the chemical essence of demonic possession" is an actual (albeit translated) quote. Let me explain why that’s even stupider than it sounds: said priest experimented on possessed children to find the physiological symptoms of demonic possession. I guess this priest did not realize that these symptoms would be wide-ranging and prone to variance, as demonic possession is not a physiological issue, it’s a spiritual one. (They would be prone to variance also because Satan is, by nature, capricious. You don't dial up the devil for consistency!) I guess the fact that this subject exists in an entirely spiritual realm is an easy thing to miss when your life is, in fact, dedicated to spirituality. Happens! Oh please, [REC]², tell me more about the science of something that has never been proven by science. That’s really smart. (The rows of cages that line the attic and shed light on the extent of the priest’s experimenting, thus suggesting some unsavory behavior on behalf of the Catholic church, do little to remedy the implications of deliberately confusing science with religion. All they did for me was reminded me how thrillingly original Martyrs was.)

[REC]² is unrelenting in its stupidity. Demonic possession, it turns out, is transmitted (transmitted!) via a thick, wormlike creature that plops like shit out of one demon’s mouth and into a future demon’s mouth. It is eventually discovered that night-vision is a plot device that “will reveal occult things,” such as a door. The night vision also seems to allow you to hear water in a well that you can’t see when the lights are turned on. In a weird side plot/distraction that involves a very tedious flashback to something we’ve already seen (this time from a different POV -- how novel), some kids from outside get trapped in the building and eventually find themselves watching a showdown between a demon zombie and a cop. Said cop urges one kid to shoot the demon with the gun she and her buddy found. Instead she shoots the cop. I wish she would have shot me to really make the POV experience fly.

The whole point of the SWAT team going in there, it turns out, is to help a priest retrieve a blood sample of the original possessed girl that was examined, so that he can, I don’t know, cure demonic possession? That sample is found early and, of course, accidentally destroyed because the movie couldn’t end after 30 minutes. The people in this movie are at least as stupid as the movie itself. No one seems to grasp the fact that these zombie demons are deadly – after being faced with a shitload of them, a SWAT guy still calmly says, “Ma’am, hold it,” when a bloody one runs up to him screeching. (“Take it easy lady,” is said to another who’s howling like a fucking demon, actually.) He then dies, I think. Like I said, it’s hard to know. Caring is harder still.

Comments

[Dodger]

I just took issue with the fact they even bothered to explain the sickness. I liked not knowing, i liked the mystery. I thougut the first one was fine (the remake was awful of course) and this sequel totally shit the bed. oh well.

[Raffy]

Thank you for commenting on the filmmaker's misunderstanding of their own medium. Friends always rag on me for bringing stuff like this up because they don't think it's important enough detail to warrant attention. Thank Jebus someone else out there understands what it feels like to constantly have your suspension of disbelief rendered moot by stupid filmmaker-ey oversights.

[miss mel]

Sooo... I saw the pic and thought it said Dreck! lol. I got really excited and thought you were bringing us some more of Mr. Andre Leon. Too bad. I'm sure a POV horror movie where ALT is the hero (or villain) sounds like it would've been better than this, dare I say it, dreck.

[Chance]

Haven't seen the original, or even this one. But I saw Quarantine, which I know is the remake. I liked it, even though everyone I ask says it stunk. So they seriously took it in a spiritual direction? Ugh, I'm fine with zombies just being a biohazard, kthxbai.

[EEE]

haha this was hilarious. I really get far too afraid of even the stupidest of horror movies, so I can't really watch them, but your reviews always make me laugh so hard.

[everlasting_concubine]

“Here you go, Rich: We’ve resurrected Russ Meyer so that he can direct Mariah Carey in a proper biopic that features a score of recently never-heard-before vintage Italo disco -- the good kind.”

That sounds like the most awesome thing ever.

[LisaL]

I liked Quarantine :P Never saw Rec though.
The sequal sounds like shit. Demon possession huh.... good grief.

[Pierre]

@Dodger, well they DID explain it in the first one, albeit quite superficially. I loved the way they threw in so much supernatural and historical plotting right when the film was climaxing.

And in general, this movie is obviously not a movie that takes it's artifice seriously. From the first film's scene where you actually watch him rewind the footage and play it back, you're already being told "yeah, just play along. We know. We know..." and it didn't bother me in the slightest.

[Pippy]

So you're saying this is not a documentary?

[Automated Forex Trading]

hahaha this was hilarious,what joke.i don't thought this has any story which i never see in other horror movie.

[Matt]

Really fantastic musing on this film you've done here. You inspired a laughing fit with "Am I dead?" I never looked at it with such a critical eye for camera technique/flaws but now that you've pointed it out, I realize how ridiculous it is. Great job.

[Josh Meyers]

Suspend your disbelief, loser.

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