Catfish/bullshit

Below is a possible explanation (based on inisder knowledge!) for the air of bullshit that arrives with the new "documentary" Catfish. Also, I spoil the entire film. Ha.

Never underestimate the power of the visceral reaction. It's underrated in criticism, where rationale and/or rationalizing are much more important drivers, but it may be key to understanding Catfish, a new film whose tagline positions it as "not based on a true story, not inspired by true events, just true." (Meanwhile, as if setting the tone of dishonesty before you even enter the theater, its trailer, leads you to believe that it is a thriller, but it is nothing of the sort.) The film concerns the 22-year-old Nev Schulman, who is supposedly on constant surveillance by his filmmaking brother, Ariel, and his business partner, Henry Joost (together Ariel and Henry own the film-production company Supermarché and directed this movie). Within the opening seconds of the film, it just feels wrong. Immediately, there is something supremely douchey about Nev. He stares into the camera with the fraudulently pompous air of a dude in a bar who's desperately out to impress with his yammering and cool-guy vibe. There are subtle things like his perma-smile and far-off look that make everything he says seem contrived. It is an Internet cliche to immediately dismiss something as, "FAKE!" and yet that is the first thing I wrote down while watching this movie. If Catfish had arms, it would constantly be touching its neck.

Judge Judy has an arsenal of phrases she barks at people: "'Um' is not an answer!" is probably the most frequent one, but, "If it doesn't make sense, it isn't true," is the most useful. A lot of Catfish doesn't make sense. New York City resident Nev starts receiving paintings from an 8-year-old phenom from Michigan named Abby (she reaches out to him initially because a photo of his in that appeared in the New York Sun inspired her painted response). The inherent creepiness of a 22-year-old guy corresponding with an 8-year-old female stranger is barely considered. However, in gentle response to potential inappropriateness, Nev does begin corresponding with Abby's mother, Angela, who eventually informs him that Abby's gallery shows have resulted in her paintings selling for thousands of dollars. It takes Nev months to even begin to investigate such claims. Maybe his Google button is broken. In the meantime, Nev embarks on a full-on Internet-only affair with Abby's 19-year-old sister, Megan. He jumps into this heedlessly, without any introspection or questioning from others regarding why a reasonably attractive 22-year-old should need to begin a romantic relationship with a complete stranger halfway across the country via a medium that conducts lies so easily. He relies on this girl's weird, downscale modeling photos on Facebook, instant messages, texts and phone conversations as proof of her existence, apparently never going elsewhere to look her up. Or her mother. Or her phenom sister.

I saw where this was going as soon as he started talking to Megan (well, I actually thought Megan would turn out to be a dude, but I knew something was up immdiately, as would anyone). What took me a split second to realize apparently took Nev nine months, because it isn't until he's traveling close enough to Michigan to make meeting Megan an actual possibility that he begins checking out the claims of her and her family. Within a few minutes, he finds that they are almost entirely bogus (it starts with him discovering that songs she sent him supposedly performed by her are the works of other artists -- Google button fixed?). When he finally makes the trip to Angela's house, he finds that Angela is nowhere near the MILF she claimed to be in her pictures, Abby is not a painter and Megan is nowhere to be found because she doesn't exist. So begins a half hour of wringing the truth out of Angela, who lives what most urbanites would deem a bleak existence in the middle of nowhere with her bumpkin husband. She spends her days taking care of her two mentally challenged stepsons, who are so violent that they must be medicated and restrained so that they do not hurt themselves. Angela slowly spins her tale of seeking refuge in alternate identities via the Internet (a story, by the way, that was already getting tired in 1995 -- that this is the crux of Catfish should tell you how unnecessary this film would be even if it were entirely true). As Angela shares her pathetic method of escape, Nev nods and grins and plays the understanding friend the entire time. He never once shows any anger for being taken for a ride or any palpable disappointment for the woman of his dreams turning out to be an invention. We are supposed to believe that this guy is such a saint, he can withstand months of deception on pure compassion alone.

A friend of mine who's a friend of someone who worked on this film (and yes, that's a disclaimer -- take this with the same grain of salt you would any other non-attributed rumor) has a theory as to what really happened here. I post it mainly because I find it to be a satisfying explanation of Catfish's pervasive nonsense. My friend told me that he thinks that since the Schulmans and Joost do posses actual brains (despite what you seen on screen), they were in on this from the start. They knew they were being taken for a ride and were willing to hop on and play along (without letting Angela know what they knew) for the sake of filmmaking. There is a sharp contrast in tone between the pre-Angela portion of the film and the parts where Angela shares her misery. As a gentle wretch, she seems like the realest thing there. (Although her husband, who provides the title in a moment of redneck clarity when he describes the packing of catfish in shipments of cod to keep the latter fish agile and delicious -- "I thank God for catfish, because we'd be droll, boring and dull if we didn't have someone nipping at our fin" -- seems as fake as anything, so hmmmm.) It is my friend's opinion that Catfish is real in as much that it is a documentary about catching someone in the act, spun as a sensitive meditation on human connection and identity.0. In this light, it is, at least, grossly disengenuous. If in fact they did exploit this woman's pathetic and intricate attempt at escape (she created a network of friends on Facebook for Abby, Megan and herself to corroborate her lies) without fully revealing their knowledge or intentions, they're even douchier than Nev's initial behavior suggested. An eye for an eye is one thing; an eye for a camera lens is another.

Interestingly, my friend also tells me that Angela initially was on board with promoting the movie, and then changed her mind and attempted to sue them. I do not know the nature of her proposed charges (or, again, if this is even true), but becoming angry after uncovering deceit and wanting to take action seems a much more human response than anything Nev does the entire time he's on screen.

Since Catfish caused a rapturous stir at Sundance, there has been a growing murmur regarding the veracity of the supposed doc (actually, adding to the confusion, it's being sold as a "reality thriller"). Even at the festival itself, at least one person sensed that something wasn't right. In January, Movieline posted an account of a Q&A that was quickly cut off (telling!) when an audience member suggested that what he had just seen was a "faux documentary." The defensive chortling Ariel Schulman directed at that guy is almost word-for-word what he's gone on to tell Rebecca Milzoff in her story about the film that ran in New York this week: "So my brother is the best actor since Brando, and we’re the best writers in Hollywood?" Actually, the answer is no on all counts. And that's the problem.

Comments

[Jason]

Thank you for posting this. I really didn't want to see this movie, but I still wanted to know what the "big twist" was. So thanks for writing about it! It sounds like the filmmakers are entirely too pleased with their own perceived cleverness. So, yes: douchey.

[peppermint]

Somewhere, M. Night Shymalan is writhing in jealousy for not having thought this idea up himself and for not getting to 'play' Nev.

[veg]

And I thought the big twist was that when they went to the damn barn to meet the women that monsters and shit would pop out.

Glad you dished the tea.

Skipping it now for sure!

[Michelle]

Thank you.
We got to see an advanced copy of this and thought the hype was complete bullshit.
As always, you rock.

[wakeupmaggie]

Catfish are literally bottom-feeders; so there's that. Also, in what world is the conclusion that if the documentary is faux they must be the best writers in Hollywood and the brother be as great an actor as Brando valid? What an annoying trailer and what cloying personalities these guys have. Thanks for the heads up.

[Rose]

Yeah, I saw this in 2006. It was called "Night Listener" and starred Robin Williams.

[michelle]

a friend let me know that while Nev was at sarah lawrence (barf) he was expelled for punching a girl in the face. but only after the students started a letter-writing campaign to get him kicked out of school. his mother was on the board of directors and his discretions always went un-punished.
so yea, i had no intention of seeing this fools movie. thanks for letting me know the ending was just as lame as i expected it to be.

[Sue Ellen]

THANK YOU! So happy I didn't waste my money seeing this. I'm going to see "Machete" instead.

[zamblee]

Wait a second. Anderson Cooper said this movie was good. Do you actually have the balls to disagree with Anderson Cooper?

[zamblee]

By the way, do you even know what generally happens to people in the "entertainment industry" who disagree with Anderson Cooper? It normally involves a forced sexual encounter with, you guessed it: Frank Stallone.

[Leanspa]

How much of a Premiership players training is spent on talking in soundbites and bullshit?

LeanSpa

[Kristi]

"Yeah, I saw this in 2006. It was called "Night Listener" and starred Robin Williams.

Posted by: Rose"

Yup. And Rosie O'Donnell had a similar experience in her book. She thank Armistead Maupin ("Tales of the City") in the acknowledgments. He wrote the novel, "Night Listener" on which the film was based.

[Kristi]

Thanked. Not thank.

[Brenda]

I saw a documentary recently about a very similar story called Talhotblond. It's much more interesting than this doucher's faux documentary because, um, it's not fake. I suggest you all check it out!

[widemud]

It is a good movie to waste time on rainy day

[grafittix]

I'm so glad you wrote this. I was curious about the hype.

[davissa]

The trailer looked like a Dateline two-hour special with bonus reenactments.

[widemud]

All handheld-camera movies make me puke!

[widemud]

I'll wait for the DVD comes out in Chinatown

[Nonplussed]

Thank you.
They're not getting a penny of my money.

[MB]

At least two of the Law & Order franchises have done similar stories. When your indie film is ripping off Dick Wolf, you're in trouble my friend.

[Bortbort]

That claim about Nev getting expelled from Sarah Lawrence for decking some girl in the gut is true. That kid was in my sculpture class at the time.

[Marie]

Hear, hear!

I'm with Jason et al. I saw this trailer and was puzzled, maybe a little intrigued. Now I just don't care. Thanks very much for saving me the price of a matinee ticket.

[Liane]

lol @ zamblee...Frank Stallone...horrifying.

[Enlarge Maxx]

Just go under recipes at both sites, they have drop menus for main courses and what type of meat, in your case it would be fish.. you can also just type in catfish in the search bar on the recipe page and it will bring up just the catfish recipes..
Enlarge Maxx