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Best commercial ever?

 

I am not one of those people who says, "I love that commercial!" On the contrary, I do a great job of tuning them out (to a fault -- references to commercials are the most consistent pop culture references that go flying over my head). Weirdly, I heard this one playing from the other room and couldn't believe what the voice over was saying about Immortals. It's truth in advertising to the extreme and admirably doesn't take seriously what obviously shouldn't be taken seriously in the first place. Won't spoil it here, but full text is below:

No trick, no treat

Unfortunately (or something), I'm breaking from tradition by not dressing my cat up for Halloween this year. I hope you have a good support system in place that will help you deal with this great tragedy. Halloween's cancelled, guys, since I can't make pop culture references by dressing my cat in an outfit that my boyfriend would have done the lion's share of work conceiving and creating anyway. BOO HOO (emphasis on the boo because of what was once Halloween).

In all seriousness: Whoops! I blame the fact that we redid our kitchen (again, my boyfriend did the lion's share of work because...I don't know. I'm domestically lazy and incompetent?). Also, I'm in Austin, Texas, for a reason that I can't wait to recount and share. I'm right on top of that, Roses.

In the meantime, please accept these pictures of Winston sitting on a pizza box as a shitty substitution for pictures of him in a Halloween costume. He's a pizza guy or an eating-disorder encourager or an anti-pizza box supporter or a vegan. You choose!

Two many

This show just rejected a girl who brought her own pickles to set and got down. Seriously, you don't even need to give Bianca a hotdog in order for her to get all blowjobby.

Take a good look at what you're leaving behind, ANTM.

Bre's on down the road

Bre can't even...

...clearly. And that is why she is no longer on the show.

Ugh

Please excuse my silence -- I started a new job this week (arts writer for The Daily) and the transition from my brief month and a half of doing freelance has been a little tough. I haven't even watched ANTM yet this week (although that's because I was on Neil Strauss' new Sirius show last night, which was...an experience, for sure). I do that and get that recap up some time and be better next week, promise.

Miss Jackson, if you're bitchy

Gif-bait:

And who am I to refuse?

Awesome intro, great job!

 

I'll tell ya what, this intro to registered Encourager Liz Curtis Higgs' VHS Mirror, Mirror on the Wall, Have I Got News for You was intriguing enough to get me to watch the whole 45-minute thing. It paled in comparison, I'm sad to report.

Downton Abbey: What's unsaid

I'm in love with Downton Abbey, like the rest of the world, but while watching it on Netflix with subtitles (I CAN'T UNDERSTAND ENGLISH!!!), it struck me that this show could be distilled down to its wordless expressions. Here, then, is a sort of Cliff's Notes of everything you need to know about Downton Abbey (minus the backhanded double entendres that tend to conclude scenes -- those you need actual words for).

Signature walk your ass out of here

For shame! All that rouge and nowhere to go.

Judy Jetson Loves Dudes: A supercut

 

But for real, it was progressive of Hanna-Barbera to allow Judy Jetson to be this promiscuous without facing shaming or derision. Maybe it's regrettable that dudes are all she was into, but whatever. She's a cartoon not a role model!

Also, she seems to have a taste for gay men, which is also kind of progressive.