Clearly, the best album

Here is the first thing you should know about Carol Channing's 2009 album of negro spirituals and assorted Lord-praising:

And here are 27 more things:

Tour de force! God don't like ugly, but he looooves croaky.

From skimming her memoir, Just Lucky I Guess, I know that Channing used to sing negro spirituals with her father, whom she thinks may have had a black mother. It seems ridiculous that snowy white Carol Channing may be at least a quarter black, but whatever, it's her life. Even if that is true, though, it's absurd that this woman would commit to tape the line, "I'm gonna be the cotton-pickin' rage of the age." But then again, if this whole damn thing weren't absurd (I purchased it as a result of becoming vaguely interested in her after seeing the overall underwhelming documentary Carol Channing: Larger Than Life and then listening to the album's ridiculous clips on Amazon), I wouldn't have taken the time to mine it for moments.

Comments

[bleh]

I would love to hear Jim Jones' mother do a remix to any of these tracks.

It would be perfection of the craggy voices.

Legendary talent.

[torrinpaige]

Apparently, when I was but a small child, I was both fascinated and terrified of Carol Channing. My grandmother reports that whenever she was on television (the Love Boat or her myriad of appearances on television specials)I would rush in,stand in front of the television, cover my eyes with my hands and then peek at Carol through my fingers while she did her thing. Gram reports that when she asked me why I was only peeking, I told her, "If I look at her too long, she'll eat my face." Now, granted, I was probably a very peculiar child, but I can't help but say that after listening to these wonderful excerpts, I still somewhat feel the same way.

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This is the first time I heard this, but I loved it.

[Ariella]

This is the best thing you've done since Jessie J awfulness

[evilwilma]

I don't care how ridiculous these clips are, I could not love this dear woman more if you paid me.

[Tom Blunt]

I attended a record signing event at Borders in NYC to buy this album and meet Carol. It was seriously the most surreal thing ever, with more security and police than a papal visit. When Carol came on she was basically wearing a sort of tracksuit and had a ponytail right on the top of her head. Like, she is Carol Fucking Channing, and she will put a ponytail wherever she fucking wants one, okay?

Anyhow during the Q&A she would just occasionally burst into song (unaccompanied) and everyone would just wait patiently for her to finish and then get back to answering the questions.

I made my straight friend Vince go with me, because once he made me go with him to the largest family-owned Christian bookstore in the US (located in South Carolina) to attend a signing by the authors of the Left Behind series, and I figured this was the closest gay equivalent to that experience.

[Laura]

This post slays me! Unrelated, but any plans to do more 2 Man Chain Gang reports? They were so great!

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Very nice album, very inspirational songs.

[Marcus]

The "ying" to Phillys Diller's "yang". Love me some Carol. For about two years during my early 20's, Carol screaming, "Oh raspberries!" was the ringer on my cell. I thought I was the coolest kid on the east side of the Mississippi.

[LDuhon]

It's like a little kid who somehow got hold of her parents' cassette-tape recorder and a blank tape.

[scorzi]

I am currently alone in my apartment and snickering with tears down my face. I cannot stop clicking the audio for "I'm just a little old chunk of coal." My stomach hurts from laughing. This is insanity.

[African Mango Supplement]

It's so refreshing to find articles like the ones you post on your site. Very informative reading.

[Superman Stamina]

I just love this album folks. I really do!!

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[The2GirlsTeachSex]

One of the best albums ever, period.

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