Because my adoration for Whitney Houston is well documented, people have been offering their condolences to me, which is a little weird (it's not like I knew her better than anyone!) but entirely nice. I'm OK! Sad, for sure, but it's easy to find tangents of perfection, beauty and hilarity to distract yourself with when reminsicing about Whitney Houston. Here was someone so gorgeous, her warts were attractive.
To think of anyone's life as a cautionary tale is condescending (true acceptance includes flaws) and selective. Unless you are model-pretty with the best voice on the planet and have been rewarded for both with international celebrity, Whitney's complicated story doesn't apply to you. The best we could ever do was admire it from afar, the worst we could do is reduce it to a one-sentence moral. What can you learn from Whitney's addiction that Nancy Regan didn't teach you almost 30 years ago?
I was really looking forward to watching Whitney turn into a crazy old lady. The fun she already was predicted the fun she would have been! I was also looking forward to her comeback, which for the last decade, flirted with the horizon. Selfishly, I feel cheated out of some great chapters, but the early ones are rich enough to provide a lot of solace.
I've been pondering the thematic line in Whitney's "Didn't We Almost Have It All": "The ride with you was worth the fall, my friend." It seems like it should apply here, and it almost does. Jon Caramanica said it really well (with eerie prophecy) days before those pictures of Whitney looking disheveled outside of Kelly Price's party surfaced: "To be Whitney now, you had to be Whitney then." A life is over, and Whitney wore it so publicly that we now know exactly what we are missing. Nothing is "worth" someone's death, but I feel so fortunate to have shared some of Whitney's life.
I wrote a more formal tribute for work. During my research scramble, I rewatched a lot of her 2009 interview with Oprah Winfrey, which was just so wonderful and comprehensive that it's about as close to a memoir as we got from Whitney. The part of the interview that affected me the most during my review was the discussion on the death of Michael Jackson, which affected Whitney so greatly that she teared up during her recollection. Watching this in light of her death, I felt a weird unity with this distant star and so much farther away.
I think your second paragraph sums up exactly what I've been feeling about the tone around some of the response to Whitney's death. She deserves better than to be used as an excuse for some finger-wagging moralizing. For some reason, I too thought she'd be with us for a long, long time. To paraphrase, I recall one of those lines from that infamous Sawyer interview where she remarked that she wouldn't break, because she "wasn't made of glass, baby." It's funny that this comes after your Millie Jackson post, I was looking forward to the day that she'd be able to look back at her career, free of any of the comeback pressure, with the same sass and sense of humour that Millie has.
Posted by: Tommy | February 12, 2012 at 01:01 PM
Tommy, you're so right about that second paragraph. Rich, thanks for that.
Posted by: ger | February 12, 2012 at 02:27 PM
I agree. So refreshing to see this perspective in this judgmental jungle of assumptions and opinions. Thank you, Rich.
Posted by: DJP | February 12, 2012 at 03:37 PM
So I DJ kids' dance parties at a resort and you know we dropped How Will I Know and I Wanna Dance With Somebody on those children.
Posted by: Jonny | February 12, 2012 at 06:36 PM
Even while she was alive, plenty of people were rushing to eulogize her voice, if not her entire career, but you always celebrated Whitney, even (and especially) during her troubled patches. I think that's why so many of us thought of you when we heard the sad news, Rich.
Posted by: spazmo | February 12, 2012 at 07:08 PM
Anyone who's had relatives that were hardcore addicts, know how deadly addictions are and can't just ignore the fact that the drug addicts are still in denial and still in danger of sudden death. It doesn't mean that acknowledging the fact that the person isn't OK is a judgment. It's just the truth.
I was one of the people that applauded Wendy Williams' stating the truth after Whitney's Oprah appearance and got slammed her for not drinking the kool-aid. But I saw it as voicing concern rather than judgment. It's just like everytime my brother's claimed they were done with the drugs. You see the truth in their eyes and worry. With Whitney, I saw the truth and worried.
That's why her death hit me so hard. I held onto hope that she'd make it. We don't know if she had drugs in her system, but I know for a fact that sometimes it's not the actual drug that kills you; it can be a bad heart or brain weakened from years of having toxins weakening every cell and muscle.
If Whitney didn't have any talent, she'd be one of many. What makes her one of a kind is the fact that her voice and music still brings us joy after her death and in spite of her addictions.
Posted by: Libressa | February 13, 2012 at 12:06 AM
Do you know what Whitney & El DeBarge's story was?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fKCi1OHBKVA
Posted by: chikochevere | February 13, 2012 at 12:51 AM
I'm with spazmo. Thanks for this tribute.
Posted by: Gen | February 13, 2012 at 12:26 PM
I also agree with Tommy about your second paragraph. We're all becoming too jaded and cynical these days. Thanks for the lovely article.
Posted by: Maja | February 13, 2012 at 01:26 PM
Thank you, Rich. RIP, lady with THE VOICE.
Posted by: Elissa | February 13, 2012 at 01:37 PM
So sad about the Whitney Houston death. It is a shame she died so young. My comment is on the news coverage.
It took awhile to be the celebration of her life. But, almost half the coverage is about her drug use and all the Bobbi Brown issues.
There should be some law preventing the media was digging into a dead celebrities past health issues. I realize as a celebrity she is open season when she is living. After all she had a publicist who gets her into these events to further her career and income. But now, what career to further so I think there should be a law. Protect the memory.
Lladro
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'model-pretty'
Blech. So odd to use that expression when, really, what does it mean? A small nose? Underweight? No visible scars? It's just so awfully American and boring to imagine you can say someone looks like a model and not only assume that everyone knows what you mean but that they'll also agree that that is truly what is 'pretty.'
Posted by: TK | February 19, 2012 at 11:05 PM
The death of these stars is still hard to accept… Despite the criticisms they had, they still managed to get up after that. Are you a Michael Jackson fan too? Both of them were actually at their best during their generation! They will still continue to amaze people - that's a fact.
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